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Reviews for Sleeping Beauty

By : SilentNiobe

From Silverfrost on September 08, 2008
Chapter 7 Breakdowns etc.
well Alice is certainly starting to unravel now, being distressed enough to call on her friends in the middle of the night. Their reaction to her was well done as was the curious kids at the top of the stairs, just like it would be, really good stuff. Jean;s concern for her, Alice's admission which must be hard for her and Jean's predictable reaction from a rational standpoint that Alice has been under to much pressure and is maybe going mad but doing what she needs to help her by having her stay.

This bit was wonderful... "She groaned in frustration. There was the disturbing fire in her body again! Who could ever believe it, she, an unrelenting supporter of female independence, to be so aroused by such displays of male dominance! That was certainly not her! Or� was it? Maybe that was her true self and she had been hiding it all this time?

She let out a sigh of exasperation and returned to chewing on her pen. It was true, the elf made her feel like� a woman� like� Argh! I can�t even find the words to describe it! she thought with annoyance. Legolas was gentle but hard at the same time, so careful, so seductive, so charming, so considerate, so dominating, so� so what she considered distinctively male"

He is just fantastic isn't he? No wonder she is questioning everything about herself and her veliefs because of how he makes her feel. Love again how Alice fights against it, tries to reason with herself, remind herself of Logan and fails.

"She was actually falling in love with that imaginary being! I mean, how pathetic IS that? came the reprimand inside her head.

Maybe she would need that doctor after all. That voice in her head had started talking TOO much."

Ha ha... I can SO relate to this!

lovely when they are together again and he apologizes, knowing he should be patient but remembering his rage. "only accentuated his desperate loneliness and grief. But knowing that another man held the heart of his own wife� That he dared to touch what was only his to cherish and be the one to comfort her� it caused a tidal wave inside him, which covered all his senses and blinded his reason! It was painful, stinging, sizzling hot and unbearable!" You describe the emotion of jealousy so well!

"It was such a betrayal to be enjoying herself with another man, even if it was only in her dreams. Heck, she was FANTASIZING about someone else! She surely wouldn�t have liked it if Logan fantasized about some other woman!"
This is so true, we try to kid ourselves that private fantasies are harmless because they are only in the mind but they are not, they are just as much a betrayal in a way as a real life physical relationship. I like how you elaborate this idea in further chapters too and it brings things to a crisis. Excellent following through of your themes in this story.

Nice that they are in another location yet again, this time Minas Tirith. Enjoyed the conversations between them and the very differing voices and personalities that you give to Legolas and Alice, emphasing their differences and at the same time showing how and why they have this amazing attraction to each other.

Laughed and cried at the intensity of the kiss. "trying to recover from what he had called a kiss; she would more accurately describe it as a nuclear bomb." OH YES! Indeed!

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From Silverfrost on September 06, 2008
Chapter 5 A Jealous husband. This was just a fantastic chapter, so full of emotion.
Beautiful seamless moving into the dreamworld. Love how Alice registers the touch first and how much more tender and "featherlight" it is than Logan's touches. Made me shiver with longing. He realisation that he "turned upside down her peaceful life", how true. I liked the simile of the pebble in the lake causing ripples and fading, lovely and evocative of feelings. Poor Alice, so torn.. telling herself that this has to stop. God. I really empathise with what she is going through.
Then the sight of Legolas, himself going through torture, so well described for him and the enigma he is. "the gravity of his gaze revealing a whirlwind of emotions" and the sexually charged nature of their touch. Fantastic, written just right, enough to drive you wild but not too much.

This paragraph is just perfect! "Every time he touched her, she became completely unbalanced! Was it possible to feel so realistically infatuated in a dream? Because she was sure that was the case. Ever since the first dream, the elf had been the only thing on her mind. As many times as she told people she just wanted to discover the historical background of the myth, she only wanted to know more about this, this... elf that had been consuming her waking hours since that first dream. Damnit! She must be compulsively searching and fretting because she knew, deep in her mind, that Logan was not satisfying her in some way. Feeling this figment of her imagination run his hand over her shoulder, she admitted the truth to herself. No one had ever made her feel the way this elf made her feel. Of course no man ever could. You�ve conjured your perfect lover out of your own head. �But I love Logan�, part of her mind insisted. �He�s everything I want, really.� You love Logan so much, yet you spend all your time trying to prove your dream lover is real? She gritted her teeth against the realization that she had no answer for herself."
Of course no man could ever make you feel like Legolas could! What a dilemma. BIG DEEP SIGH. You have really nailed what it feels like to be in love with Legolas.

Your description of Rivendell and how it made her feel is so evocative and beautiful and dreamlike. I Felt for Alice as she tries to be sensible and fight against him, but surely it is a losing battle? "She breathed in his scent and it did magical things to her mind." Lovely sentence. Just how it would be! The first kiss was sensational. Of course she had never been kissed like that before. You take what what is a romantic cliche and make it something transendental. Gorgeous!

And this...."But is a dream enough? the sane part of her mind wondered. She needed comfort and stability, didn�t she? Could a dream offer her that? Logan was safe and familiar, surely being a little bored and lonely was normal. Legolas was only a dream� and she was a very down-to-earth person." Isn't this the dilemma so many of struggle with in our love lives and marriages, you nailed the problem perfectly.

Then her revelation and his reaction! "He had bound himself to her and become her husband. He had almost faded away because of her. He had been waiting for her for thousands of years. He had been hopeless in his endless pain for longer than he could remember, and still lay in living death in his palace. All because of her, the only woman he had ever loved, even with all their differences and prejudices, the obstacles and the consequences.

And she had fallen in love with another man."
Even a perfect Elf would of course lose it at that point, Love how he struggles with his rage and jealousy, really sympathise with him. And to affirm that she is his and no one elses. Being possesive myself I so agree with him even though given the circumstances its impossible to expect that she does not have another life without him.

This chapter is just so full of stuff. It's my absolute favourite.

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From Silverfrost on August 28, 2008
Chapter Five, Of Elves and Marriage. Love how you have them in different locations every time she has a dream. Legolas's bedroom in Mirkwood! How romantic of him to chosen it and to show it her. Sigh, what I would do to be there! Lucky girl. Alice fighting against it and thinking she is going mad is very well done, so plausible. Her telephobe conversation with Logan where she grasps desperately back at her relationship with him and reality was well written. Very much like the contrast between the two worlds and how much confusion this is causing for Alice, torn between staying awake to avoid the dreams and yet compelled to research the myth on the internet. Very good story, nicely paced.
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From Silverfrost on August 27, 2008
Another scene change. this time to her work environment. Gives us another glimpse into her personality. I like her boss who is such a father figure, who also has reservations about her relationship with Logan, very perceptive. So she goes searching for the source of the myth, very interesting.
Loved this bit.:

"Her stomach announced its opposition to her last thought, clenching painfully. She could find no reason why she shouldn�t marry Logan, and yet it looked so wrong! Her mind always came up with all those logical arguments on why she should marry him, but her heart seemed to have a different opinion. She loved him� or maybe she didn�t? Maybe all she felt was not the kind of love that would sweep you off your feet and make you want to spend the rest of your life with someone� Yes, she was sure about that. Her love for Logan was nothing of the passionate sort. But she didn�t believe in those kinds of things! That kind of love was reserved for the past, in her opinion. Modern times demanded a companion you could lean on and find comfort with in your stressful life. Those things she could have with Logan. But was that what true love is? Would she ever find the kind of love she saw in the movies? The kind of love who would make a knight die for his lady? The kind of love who would make a Prince wait in eternal sleep for the return of his beloved?

She frowned. Is this what this thing is all about?? That deep inside I�m not happy with Logan and my subconscious decided to make me aware of it in what I dream of?!"

Having married someone for security and non passionate reasons and years later having fallen in love with an imaginary being myself, I can SO relate to this! Not sure what the right answer to the riddle is!

Love the psycholgical stuff in this story and the juxtapostion of fantasy versus reality. Looking forward to where you take this.

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From Silverfrost on August 26, 2008
Chapter three: Another change of scene, no time to get bored here! Right into Alice's very vivid dream which is beautifully described. Like the differences between Alice and Logan in their relationship which you introduce in this chapter, showing us that perhaps all is not as perfect with them together as they think. Love the way she is so affected by Legolas and his nearness and that she remembers him as the enchanted Prince. I like how you write Legloas, so beautiful yet very male and elvish and Alice, a modern woman a product of her times struggling with the feminine feelings he awakes in her. Nice that they are the lake where they first met in another life she cannot remember. Feel Legloas's sadness at this and his desperation that she find him. Alice certainly isn't going to be able to forget this and explain it away. The seed has been sown. Lovely stuff.
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From Silverfrost on August 25, 2008
Chapter Two: You catapult us forward in time to Alice grown up and very skillfully show us aspects of her adult personality and her relationship with Logan through her interaction with her friends and their children and her thoughts. Re introducing the myth and her memories by Alice telling the accepted version of the story and a child correcting her and sending her into turmoil as she remembers that night in the forest and its aftermath was clever, uncovering the fact that it had a great impact on her and foreshadowing that it will again. Great writing.
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From Silverfrost on August 24, 2008
Ok, well I know I just reviewed, but I've been reading this story again from the beginning and wanted to add some thoughts. The more I read the better it gets, definitely one to read over and over. You mention that you have written and re written the tale and that you want it to be the best it can be. I think you are achieving your aim. Its marvellous. Beautifully written, so I thought I'd take the time to give you a more in depth review chapter by chapter.

From the perspective of multiple reads and ten chapters in, it becomes apparrent just how well crafted this story is.

Chapter One: Starting off with Alice as a child is genius, we see her as a young, raw, innocent and suseptible being. Eager to do things with her older and more knowing cousins and yet afraid. Nice interesting and emotional introduction to the heroine and her character. You capture that experience of childhood so well, that primal fear of the unknown, danger and the forbidden, the bravery and curiosity fighting with it, which will be mirrored later in her experiences as an adult. Straight into the action too, depositing us right into the dark and the scary trees and the otherworldliness, brilliant. Great descriptions of the forest and I could feel how the children felt, high, excited and scared. Clever way to introduce the myth, the vision brought to life in the forest in August at full moon to children only. Really the stuff that fairytales are made of. I love how you describe the sleeping prince as an Angel (truly he is!) Alice's disbelif at the difference in the story to the one she is familiar with and then the revelation to her... gave me shivers... Then to stop there! Right at that moment. Masterful.
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From Silverfrost on August 22, 2008
SO thrilled to find an update to your story. It's just so wonderful to have a really well written and thought out HET fic to read. There's so much slash on the net and while I enjoy it up to a point it all seems to blur into the same thing after a while, slot A into slot B etc, there's only a limited amount of times and ways you can write males together without it continually repeating itself and becoming very boring even when there is a plot and some loving connection.

This story is wonderful, full of emotion. I could so identify with Alice thinking she was going mad and worrying so much about it. Of course her friends picked up on the fact she must have another lover for her feelings about Logan to have changed, quite radically, even though she is loath to admit it to herself. And of course she couldn't tell them, how can real life friends so centered in everyday reality ever understand about the overwhelming need and compelling nature of an imaginary lover. They would of course think she had gone insane.... Laughs maniacially.....

Then Alice wanting so much to be with him again, despite all her fears, unable to keep away. So lovely that they were in the Shire. Agonizing that they so want to make love to each other but hold back still, for fear and many reasons, but so like Legolas to be considerate of what she knows and feels and take it so slowly and need it to be right and perfect. This is beautifully done! Loved Legolas's pain at the ages he lived through alone without her and the many changes he has seen. Fantasic glimpse into his immortality and then Alice feeling it too, and realising that it is his love for her that has caused his inability to go to Valinor and what it has cost him. Was breathless reading it. Love how they are becoming closer and one again and understanding each other better. Really wonderful story. Please keep going!
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From Silverfrost on July 28, 2008
Hi, lovely to see another chapter. e mail is rozzan@tanglebriar.co.uk

Just loved this bit: "Honestly, she had been content with her life before. Not happy, but content; and it was enough for her. But once you�ve tasted the forbidden fruit and marvelled at its taste, you cannot go back to the �innocence� you owned before. Alice had gained the inevitable sinful knowledge of passion and true happiness, and so thirsted for more. She felt guilty, believing that what she felt was greed. But she was only a human being in need of another one."

How true this is about about being in love with Legloas! I used to be 'normal' until I saw Legloas and fell in love with such a beautiful perfect immortal being. Since then I've been yearning and what feels like seriously mentally ill.

Liked reading about how they first met. Legolas's surprise at her slapping and rejecting him. How ever did she manage that? I would have been ripping my clothes off. Hope your real life gives you more time to write another another chapter soon.

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From ANON - Anon on July 27, 2008
i love this story and am glad you have dicided to keep going with it. i hope you will update soon.

Foofie
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From curiouswombat on June 19, 2008
How lovely to find another chapter of this story. I know how difficult it can sometimes be to just get that next chapter started when other things are happening, I'm having that very problem myself at the moment! So I congratulate you on keeping going with what is a fascinating tale.
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From Rozzan on June 09, 2008
Thank You for continuing this story. It's great. But oh my goodness how could she fall asleep in his arms with Legolas so hot and aroused for her! Hope you can update soon.
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From curiouswombat on April 11, 2008
How sad to find such an interesting story unfinished.
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From deathskiss on October 13, 2007
I am really enjoying the story so far - I hope you continue with it! Looking forward to finding out how it ends.
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From Rozzan on October 12, 2007
Really intriguing story. Great idea. It's so full of emotion and passion. I like your Legolas, patient and gentle yet strong and male, jealous but managing to curb it and I like Alice's longing and her confusion. Looking forward to more.
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