A heart's miscommunication

Chapter ten Not so easy

Glorfindel jumped up when Erestor stormed in his room. He frowned. The other never did that unless gravely upset or angered. He could tell by looking at the counsellor’s face it was the second and already braced himself for the verbal battle Erestor would undoubtedly unleash upon him. The counsellor growled and plunged in the chair, stunning Glorfindel further. “Ehm… Erestor?”

Erestor looked at him with heavy eyes. “It’s all a misunderstanding, Glorfindel.” For the first time his voice sounded as old as he was and Glorfindel shivered involuntarily. “Of course it is. Has he been found?”
Erestor nodded. “Aye, Elrond has contacted me. You are to meet them so they can return home in style and officially. And I have to deal with Aiwandila.”
If possible the blond’s eyes widened further. “Aiwandila? Why? What’s she done?”
Erestor sighed. “I don’t know precisely, but apparently she’s behind their break up. Elrond wants her in jail when he returns.”
Glorfindel nodded. “I shall leave her to you. Make sure two guards are always guarding her, and use older ones, not the young ones.”
Erestor nodded, thinking exactly the same. “You know, if she’s really behind it I feel sorry for her.”
Glorfindel looked at the counsellor as if he was a completely different person and at the moment he was, at least to Glorfindel.
Erestor shrugged. “Elrond’s furious at her. I’ve never known him so angry, Glorfindel. And Elladan is bound to throw several tantrums at her as well.”
Glorfindel grinned. “Aye, you’re right. She’s to be pitied.” He left to prepare his journey.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elladan clung to his father as he cried his tears. Elrond held him and started a rocking motion. He appreciated the solitude the smith gave them, but he had seen the deep look of understanding in the eyes. There was one other who had figured it out.

Elrond waited for Elladan to look at him again and he brushed the tears away. “You’ll not get him back by crying, ion-nin.”
Elladan sniffed and tightened the embrace. “I cannot get him back, ever. He left. He thinks I am married.” His anger flared again. “Who wrote it? Maybe Erestor knows the hand. I’ll take it out on him.”
“Her.” Elladan’s eyes widened and disbelief shone from them. Elrond nodded. “Aye. Her. Aiwandila wrote that letter. And what did she tell you when you and Elrohir returned from the hunt?”

Elladan’s eyes misted over as he recalled hemoremory. He narrowed his eyes and his lips became thin. “That when she sought him to deliver my message he was packing. To leave me. And that he told her he was glad I was gone for that saved him the trouble of getting humiliated.”
Elrond sighed. “And you believed those lies?”
Elladan nodded defeated and filled with grief.

He stood up and glared at Elladan. “How could you think that? For so long? How could you even for one moment believe he’s capable of inflicting such pain? Don’t you know him?”
His father’s words made him more desperate and he cried harder. “I’m so sorry. I was only thinking of myself. I did not know I pained him so.”

Elrond narrowed his eyes. “You have but one chance to win him back, Elladan, place his needs first. Prove yourself to him.” /And you’d better be worthy. The only reason I know he’ll take you back is because he loves you still. I could see it in his eyes. But I will not tell you that. You need to find it out yourself, or you will not try and redeem yourself. And you need to in order to treat him better./ “Stop seeing all the elves that drool over him and start seeing his loyalty to you.”

He smiled. “You need to recover yourself.”
Elladan nodded but then flared up. “But how can I win him back if I don’t know where he is?”
“Start thinking like he did, like he does.” With those words Elrond left to check up on Haldir and Coirëhón. He shook his head as he corrected himself. /He’ Mistalas here./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Haldir smiled when Mistalas finally showed signs of acknowledging his changed surroundings. His head slowly turned to him and the eyes were filled with tears, pain, fear and hope. Haldir pulled him closer to himself. “Are you all right?”
Coirëhón took a few deep steadying breaths and looked Haldir in the eye. /Have I made such a mess of things?/ He shook his head. “I don’t think so.”
Haldir tightened his embrace. “I should have stopped this from happening. But Elladan was so happy to hear his father’s voice he just ran down. I’m sorry, Raven, it brought back your pain.” He sighed. “And we went to such lengths to keep them away from you. I’m so sorry, Raven.”
Hearing that name again made Coirëhónle. le. “Aye, ni ná Raven sí.”

He leaned in closer and captured Haldir’s lips, but didn’t close his eyes, afraid of seeing Elladan’s face again. Even though he realised he had some thinking to do, he was loath to hurt Haldir. Fresh tears sprung to life and Haldir pulled back shocked.

He pulled the upset elf closer to his body. “Do you want to go?”
Coirëhón shook his head. “Nay. I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore.” He clung to Haldir and cried his tears. “I hate him.”

Elrond chose this moment to enter and frowned at hearing that. He was sure the other d Eld Elladan. He decided to remain hidden and silent.

Haldir blinked and continued caressing his lover. “Love?”

Elrond’s eyes widened. /I was right then. But that means he’s now facing a hard choice: Haldir or Elladan./ He closed his eyes. /I am so sorry I could not prevent your pain. Yours and Haldir’s./

Haldir lifted his chin and brought his face level to his own. “Raven, who do you hate?”
Coirëhón wiped his tears away. “Elrond. He ruined everything.”
Haldir frowned at the words and re-established the embrace, his mind working at top speed. “How so?” But his lover continued crying and did not answer and Haldir knew instantly he would never receive one. “Does it have anything to do with your old life?” His eyes narrowed when Mistalas nodded.

“You need to get away.” He smiled at Mistalas’ bewildeexprexpression. “I’m not suggesting you run away to Mirkwood, merely that you come with me to the borders or something. I’m sure your father doesn’t mind.”

Coirëhón rested his head on Haldir shoulder and swiftly thought things through. He refused to hurt Haldir the way he’d been hurt and he did feel something for the Warden. He only needed to learn how to love him and Haldir was patient. It was the knowledge that Elladan didn’t walk out on him, didn’t do what he thought he’d done, that pained him so. For that meant in reality he had walked out on Elladan. And he had seen the pain that caused the twin.

He wiped away his tears as new resolve was born in him. “Aye, Haldir. Take me away until they’ve left.” He had hurt Elladan, but he refused to hurt Haldir. He smiled. “When can we go?”
“Whenever you want?”

“No, you can’t go.” They both turned at Elrond’s voice. The ruler noticed Haldir’s eyes hardening but ignored it. “Haldir, I want to speak to him. Alone.”
But Coirëhón s his his head. “Nay. Haldir stays. We’re leaving and not coming back until you all have left.”
Elrond approached him but held back when Haldir’s eyes narrowed dangerously. He recognized the same protectiveness in them he himself felt as well. He sighed. “But you can’t. You have to…”
Coirëhón shook his head. “I have to nothing, Elrond.”

He reassured Haldir with his eyes and stepped forward. “I know now the letter was a lie, but I can’t go back.” He narrowed his eyes when Elrond was about to intervene. “I realise I hurt Elladan and he not me. But I refuse to hurt Haldir as well. He loves me.”
Elrond sighed and looked at him, easily seeing the determination. He knew he could not talk him out of it. “But do you love him?”
Coirëhón sighed. “Not the way I love Elladan. But I do have feelings for him, deep. He’s willing to go slow and help me. I need him, Elrond.”
Elrond shook his head. “You need Elladan. You are doing this out of guilt, you fear hurting Haldir if you leave him now. But what if you can never forget Elladan? If you can never fully commit to Haldir? Do you think he won’t be hurt then?”
“If, and I say -if- that happens he will have plenty good memories to pull him through.”
Elrond smiled at him but shook his head. “Aye, but those memories will be the ones to pain him.”
“You don’t know that.”
“But I do. I know for I suffer the same pain.” He could not keep the pain from his voice. Coirëhón eyes widened and regret on his behalf entered them. Elrond smiled at seeing it. “Worry not for me. Pe, te, think about this before you decide. I shall keep my distance, but do not decide just yet. You need to think things through.”
But he could see he wasn’t going to get anywhere and he sighed. “I shall make sure the twins won’t be in your way. Stay here. They won’t come here again.”
He nodded and left, forcing his own tears to remain hidden.

Unknown to the three of them the smith saw and heard everything, even the conversation between Elrond and his ‘son’. /So Elladan was your lover and now you both pine after each other, but you refuse to hurt Haldir so you will not even consider trying again. I will have to act./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elrohir frowned when he saw Rumil walking his way, a stern expression on his face. “Ru, man nás?”
Rumil sat down. “I don’t know. I hear so many things it is confusing even me.”
Elrohir grinned and sat down. “And why seek me out for a little light? I am a beginner compared to you.”
Rumil smiled at the hidden compliment and sighed. “Because it concerns your twin. I figured you might know the truth.”
Elrohir flared forward. “Adan? What do people say?”
Rumil shrugged. “Many things. That he’s mourning his lover who walked out on him. And that he walked on his lover first and only later realised he needed him. And that he’s ditched a male lover in favour for a she-elf, who decided to leave him standing alone on their wedding day. Want to hear more?”
Elrohir shook his head. “That’s a blatant lie! Elladan is grieving because Coirëhón walked out on him for some weird reason. Thanks to Glorfindel we know he came here, but according to ata’da he never arrived. We brought Elladan here so he wouldn’t hear his love might be dead.”
Rumil gasped and closed his eyes in pain. “What tragedy befalls you Imladrian elves. Our friend Mistalas, his lover left him too, but you already know that, right?”
Elrohir nodded. “Aye, but I don’t thinkrealreally is from Imladris.”
Rumil shrugged. “We’re not sure about that ourselves, but it might be the only solution. But on the other hand, your father would never allow someone who cannot fight to travel alone.”
Elrohir nodded. “I’m sorry, I wish I could help him.”

Rumil grinned. “He’s already got a lot of friends here, us, Thrilmaldur and the smith. And your grandmother is rather fond of him as well.”
Elrohir laugh“Aye“Aye, he is quite charming. And I too felt a strange urge to protect him.”
Rumil grinned. “You too? Maybe my brother gets competition?”
Elrohir laughed. “Nay.”

Rumil sighed and made to stand but sat down again. “Wait a sec. How do you know he didn’t arrive here, your brother’s lover?”
Elrohir shrugged. “Because that’s what grandpa said.”
Rumil nodded. “Aye, but it is easy to hide if you know how. Do you have a description of him? I can ask around and look in the known hide outs.”
Elrohir sighed and nodded. From his pocket he retrieved a piece of paper. “Here, Elladan made this. Tons of them in one week alone. Keep it.” He stood and left.

Rumil looked at the picture and jumped up. /No, this cannot be. It cannot be./

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Translations:
ni ná Raven sí means : I am Raven now.
man nás means: what is it
TBC


AN:
I am having trouble reading your reviews. somehow the autor's lists is too large and i can't enter the reviews. Which, needless to say - I hope- grieves me greatly. I'm so sorry. But I will continue trying. Me stubborn.