Adult-FanFiction.org : Lord of the Rings

Making Choices	By : elvenjade Category: +Third Age > AU - Alternate Universe Views: 1435 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I own nothing and make no money from these stories. Everything related to LOTR is owned by J.R.R Tolkien

Chapter List
- 1
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- 3
Another season had passed with the turning the weather warmer in the valley. Elladan sat quietly in his study, looking towards his window. The papers on his desk were, for the moment, forgotten.
“I always seem to find you deep in thought,” Sirwen's voice whispered softly in Elladan's ear.
“I would share them if you wish to know,” Elladan replied, sitting back in his seat and easing her onto his lap. “You need only ask.”
He watched as he she shook her head then closed his eyes as her hand moved slowly through his hair. It was something that always seemed to soothe and relax him. He found it mildly amusing that he often did the very same action when he was stressed or aggravated. Perhaps it was not so much the action that soothed him now but who was doing it.
“There has been some talk,” Sirwen told him softly, continue to comb her fingers through his hair.
“Of what?” he questioned, his eyes still closed.
“Of us,” she told him, giving him a loving smile when he opened his eyes to look at her. “Nothing bad, I assure you,” she was quick to point out. “I have heard some speak of how you have changed and that is because we have become a couple.”
Elladan could not help but smile in return and he slipped both arms around her waist as she snuggled into him.
“We've been together for years, Sirwen,” he said.
“Not as we are now.” Sirwen added, “we've always been good friends and have always openly flirted with each other. Even I can feel something different in our relationship, something more than what we had before, something better.”
Elladan leaned his head back against the chair as he watched her. He knew what she was saying was true. He had been feeling it as well. Reaching over slowly, Elladan gently trailed the tips of his fingers along her jaw. He leaned his head closer and kissed her lovingly.
“Perhaps it is time we made it official,” he said. “Let the entire realm know who it is that has captured my heart.”
“We need not do anything you are not ready for,” Sirwen replied. “I care not if the entire realm knows. It matters only that we know.”
Elladan chuckled softly then kissed her again, letting it deepen slowly until he heard her moan into the kiss. He ignored the urge to take things further, at least for now. The thought of letting the realm know that he had chosen Sirwen pleased him and he told her this.
“If you are sure,” she whispered softly. She gave another soft moan as he kissed her neck and closed her eyes when she felt him mark her. It was not the first time he had left his mark, only now, it was not some place where it would be kept hidden.
“Mine,” he growled playfully into her ear then looked towards his door when he heard the amused chuckle.
“I truly hate to interrupt,” Glorfindel grinned, “however, I have been, unwillingly, volunteered to come with a request from the young trainee’s. They wish to show you some of what they have learned.”
“Unwillingly volunteered?” Elladan questioned.
“Aye,” Glorfindel nodded. “They seem to assume that should you have refused, I may have carried you there over my shoulder.”
“And just why would they assume such a thing?” Elladan wondered as he arched an eyebrow. He was not falling for that innocent look Glorfindel now had.
“I assure you, I have no idea,” Glorfindel replied. He crossed his arms over his chest as he narrowed his eyes at the oldest of Elrond's twins. “Do you plan to come willingly?”
Elladan could not help but laugh. There was no doubt in his mind now that Glorfindel had promised the young elves that he would get Elladan there one way or the other.
“You leave me little choice,” Elladan replied. He turned Sirwen's head towards him once they stood up and kissed her deeply. “I will see you shortly.”
Glorfindel moved aside so that Elladan could pass. He waited until he was sure the other elf was out of hearing range.
“Thank you, Sirwen,” he said quietly.
“There is no need to thank me for anything,” she replied, not sure why he felt he needed to thank her.
“Yes there is,” Glorfindel said. “It is because of you that he is his old self. It is good to see him smile again, to hear him laugh. You've brought him back to us.”
“This cannot be easy for you,” Sirwen said softly.
“It's not, but all I ask is that you keep him happy,” Glorfindel told her. “Tell me Sirwen, has he had more nightmares?”
Sirwen nodded quietly and she heard Glorfindel let out a deep breath. She knew then that Elladan's nightmares had concerned him as much as they did her.
“I had hoped those would have stopped by now,” Glorfindel told her. “Are they still of Elrohir?”
“Yes,” she nodded. “Though I cannot be sure if the dream is the same but he calls out for his twin each night.”
“He will need to face his twin's choice soon,” Glorfindel said, talking more to himself than he was to Sirwen. “When he does, he will need you more than ever.”
“He will need us both,” Sirwen said.
Glorfindel turned to face her, about to say more but merely nodded in agreement. He watched her leave, then left Elladan's study to join Elladan on the practice field. Along the way, he thought of Sirwen's last comment. He knew he would do anything for Elladan yet it was getting harder to see the two of them together. If Elladan came to him for comfort, would he be able to resist, or would he give in to the one thing Glorfindel wanted the most?
* ~ * ~ *
“A feast, my lord!” The young elf, Faeron suddenly rushed over to Elladan's desk.
“Stop calling me that. We’ve been friends for far too long and what is this about a feast?” Elladan questioned.
“I will not, my Lord,” he grinned. “You mentioned earlier that Imladris needed something to lighten everyone's mood. I recall your father would plan a feast when things had felt a little tense.”
“I believe this is a fine idea,” Elladan replied. “Make the arrangements.”
“And would it not be the perfect time to make an announcement?” Faeron said. “Of course it is rather obvious but this would make it more official.”
“Make what official?” Elladan asked, arching an eyebrow slightly.
“Your relationship with Sirwen,” Faeron replied.
Elladan opened his mouth to say something but the knowing look that Faeron gave made him change his mind. He knew, of course, that the other elf was right. It was time and in fact should have been done already.
“As I said,” Elladan replied, “make the arrangements.”
“Yes, my lord,” Faeron nodded, grinning when he heard Elladan growl as he rushed out of the room. He had arrangements to make and did not wish to waste any time getting them done.
Elladan grinned as Faeron had literally rushed out of his study. They had been friends almost since birth. The twins were only weeks older than Faeron was and as their mothers had been close, the three had grown up together. He also remembered a time when the twins had tried to get Faeron together with Arwen.
With a deep sigh, Elladan wondered how different their lives may now be had the twins plans had worked. If Arwen had chosen Faeron would she still have chosen to live as a mortal? Would Elrohir?
He was once again left wondering if his twin had not chosen this path just to protect Arwen, to watch over her as they had promised their father they would. In his heart, Elladan knew it was more than that. His twin would not have given up life as an elf just to watch over Arwen. That would have been something they could have done together.
“Enough,” Sirwen's soft voice whispered in his ear. “You cannot change his choice.”
Elladan let out a deep breath then turned his head and gave her a small smile. He moved back as she walked slowly around to stand in front of him.
“You always have that same faraway look when you are thinking about Elrohir,” she told him. “I know how hard it is for you to accept the choice he made.”
“It is not about accepting his choice,” Elladan replied. She was the only one he felt comfortable enough with to discuss Elrohir. “I just wish to understand why he made his choice.”
“He will come to you when he is ready,” she replied, slowly combing her fingers through his hair knowing it would relax him. “He always does.”
“In the past,” Elladan said. “I am not so sure he will now. If he felt he could come to me he would not have left.”
Sirwen sighed softly as she tilted Elladan's head back and kissed him softly. She still felt he was holding a lot of his feelings back, but for now she knew there was little she could do other than to give him comfort when it was needed.
“Now, what is this feast I have heard of?” she asked, knowing a change of subject was needed. “Faeron is far more excited than usual.”
As he looked up at her from where he sat, the smile she gave him let him know that she was not going to let him continue with any depressing thoughts. It was one of the many things he loved about her.
“Would you not wish to be surprised?” Elladan asked her, knowing that was not going to work
“No,” she replied, shaking her head. “Now will you tell me or do I have to use other ways to make you talk.”
Elladan could not help but grin at her as he considered his options. He pulled her down into his lap and kissed her deeply.
“Faeron believes that a feast is what the realm needs,” he finally told her. “He also feels it would be a good time to announce our relationship.”
“I knew I liked him,” she replied, smiling softly.
Elladan chuckled and nodded in agreement. He leaned back on his seat, one of his hands rested gently on her leg as the other hand caressed her back.
“It is a big step,” he said “and one we should have already taken. However it is my fault for being distracted with things beyond my control, for that I do apologize.”
“There is no need,” she assured him. “I know where I stand with you, where we stand with each other and I care not if the entire realm knows it or not,” she added. “Of course if you wish to shout it to everyone we pass, I am fine with that as well.”
Elladan could not help but laugh at her reply. Reaching out, he tucked some of her hair back behind her ear.
“Come, you need a break and it is almost time for the midday meal,” Sirwen said. “We have time to enjoy some fresh air before we are expected in the dining hall.”
Elladan waited until she stood up then did the same as he kissed her hand softly. She always seemed to know exactly what he needed and when he needed it. It reminded him of how his own mother had been with his father.
A few days passed and each time Elladan saw Faeron, the younger elf was busy planning the feast. Only a few times had Faeron come to Elladan to get his opinion of something or to find out what some of Sirwen's favorite foods were.
“Sit down, Faeron,” Elladan had finally stopped the elf. “Take a few minutes. You have done plenty in such a short time, and you have earned a break.”
“I am almost done. There are but a few minor details left to take care of my...” he started to say until Elladan growled at him
“You of all others do not have to call me that,” Elladan hissed. “We have been friends our whole lives, camped many night together. We’ve seen the same wars and fought at each other’s side.” Elladan said. “Drop the formalities, Faeron. You know what my name is.”
“I do,” Faeron replied, finally taking a seat across from Elladan. “However, it would not be proper.”
“Proper?” Elladan laughed. “When have you ever cared about what is proper? I can recall a time, after a few bottles of my father's strongest whiskey mysteriously vanished, where you walked across the main yards completely naked, greeted everyone you passed and even invited my sister to dinner.” Elladan grinned. “In front of my father, no less.”
“I still only vaguely remember that day,” Faeron chuckled. “And I have not touched your father's whiskey since” he added.
“I believe Erestor helped him to find a better hiding place for his whiskey,” Elladan chuckled.
“I cannot imagine why,” Faeron added, making them both laugh.
“Since you seem to have everything under control for the feast,” Elladan said, “perhaps you would be so kind as to let me know when it is?”
“A week from tomorrow,” Faeron replied, leaning back in the seat. “Everything is taken care of and the decorations should be set up within the next few days,” he added. “There are to be some of your favorite foods as well as Sirwen's along with plenty of food to satisfy everyone's tastes.”
Elladan felt himself relax now that he knew everything seemed to be in order. Faeron was more than able to handle things which meant that Elladan could stop worrying about things and just focus on enjoying the feast.
“It would seem you have thought of everything,” Elladan told him, “and are managing better than I could have.”
Faeron grinned at Elladan then leaned closer, motioning for Elladan to do the same.
“That may be why it is my job,” Faeron whispered quietly then grinned as Elladan laughed.
The two of them talked for a while longer, discussing the last few minor details that Faeron wanted to see done over the next few days. He assured Elladan had nothing to worry about and all would be taken care of before the day of the feast.
* ~ * ~ *
Elladan should have known better than to let his guard down, to allow himself to become too relaxed. There were just a few days left until the feast, and Faeron had once again assured him that everything was in order. Elladan had started to feel better about things. Then the attack came and once again, Elladan's life was filled with chaos.
“The orcs came out of nowhere,” Glorfindel told Elladan. The older elf was leaning against the wall as one of the healing assistants was looking at the cut on Glorfindel's arm. “We had no idea they were there until they attacked.”
Elladan shook his head and ran his hands through his hair as he paced back and forth. He should have seen this coming, should have known things had been going too well.
“Elladan.” Glorfindel tried to get his attention.
“Why now?” Elladan hissed, stopping to face Glorfindel. “Why are there even orcs left?”
“We always knew there were some remaining,” Glorfindel said,” though not many. Few did survive and went into hiding.” He could see how stressed Elladan was. Once the healer had left them alone, Glorfindel reached out and placed his hand on Elladan's shoulder.
“What was the reason for them to attack?” Elladan asked quietly. Glorfindel's touch was more soothing then Elladan wanted to admit, even to himself.
“It could be anything,” Glorfindel said, leaving his hand where it was. “Perhaps they were desperate. We had supplies they may have wanted or needed. It did not seem as if this was an attack on Imladris, they were too few in number.”
“Yet their number was large enough to leave you wounded and two others dead?” Elladan snapped.
“You don't think the amount of my guilt is enough that you feel you must add to it?” Glorfindel growled. “I was there, I watched them die. They were my friends too, Elladan,” he hissed. “I trained them the same time I trained you and your twin.”
Elladan watched as it was Glorfindel who started pacing. He felt the other elf's anger and frustration and his own outburst had not helped.
“After this, maybe it is best if the feast was canceled,” Elladan said quietly. He was not prepared for the glare he now got from Glorfindel.
“Do not even think about it,” Glorfindel warned. “We were on patrol for a week and all I heard was talk of this feast. We've not had one in quite some time and I dare say the entire realm is looking forward to it.”
“We just lost two of our own,” Elladan said “It would not be right...”
Glorfindel shook his head as he took a step closer and stood directly in front of Elladan. He was fighting the urge to reach over and pull Elladan into a tight embrace, but instead he placed his hands behind his back and gripped his own wrist tightly.
“Elladan, Imladris needs this, needs something to once again look forward to,” Glorfindel said. “There are too few of us left and we all felt the loss when your father left and again when your twin made his choice to leave.”
“None more than me,” Elladan replied, though it had been mostly said to himself. Looking now and seeing the sadness in the other elf's eyes, Elladan knew that Glorfindel had heard him.
“Your father had been planning a feast for your mother when she informed him of her choice to sail,” Glorfindel told him. He reached over and turned Elladan's head back towards him when the younger elf had looked away. “Two days after he watched that ship take his wife away, he had that feast anyway. Erestor was convinced that it was still a good idea. He was right.”
Elladan started to say something but the sudden feel of Glorfindel's hand moving from his shoulder and caressing along his neck, silenced him.
“Your father trusted him enough to take Erestor's advice and I can only hope you trust me enough to do the same,” Glorfindel said.
“I have always trusted you,” Elladan replied.
“Good, then have the feast,” he said. “Let the realm celebrate some good news. It is long overdue.” He paused when he still saw the doubt in Elladan's eyes “I've doubled the patrols along the borders, all traces of the orcs have been dealt with and I have had Faeron send out some scouts to make sure there are no more threats.”
“And what of the families, Glorfindel?” Elladan asked. “Am I supposed to offer my condolences and then invite them to come celebrate with me?”
“No, you offer your condolences, you tell them that their sons fought bravely and that you mourn the loss of two good friends. You let them see your grief and offer them any comfort that you can,” Glorfindel replied. “Whether they attend the feast is up to them. I would not be surprised to see them there.”
“It seems selfish,” Elladan admitted. “What right do I have to celebrate when they grieve for the ones they lost?”
“The choice is yours, Elladan.” Glorfindel said. His hand was still caressing along Elladan's neck, though he had not realized it at first. He had not failed to notice how Elladan leaned into his touch.
“I will trust your judgment,” Elladan finally replied. His eyes had closed when he felt Glorfindel's light touch. When he opened them again, he saw a look in the older elf's eyes that he did not quite recognize.
“We should go,” Glorfindel said, forcing himself to step back before he did something that he might regret.
“Your arm...” Elladan noted, glancing now towards the cut that was on Glorfindel's arm.
“I have felt and survived worse,” Glorfindel replied. “My arm is fine, though a little sore at the moment.”
Elladan heard his reply but he would not be so easily convinced and took a few moments to examine the wound himself, stopping only when he was satisfied. Once done, he looked up in time to see the amused look that Glorfindel was giving him.
“I am allowed to be concerned,” Elladan replied, glancing away before he said anything else.
“Come,” Glorfindel said, letting the moment pass. “You should speak with the two families now. I will go with you.”
Elladan merely nodded, not wanting to admit that he was glad to have Glorfindel go with him to do this. Once again, he was reminded of how different he was from his father. Elrond always seemed to be able to handle whatever challenge he was met with. Elladan wondered if it would ever be the same for him. He knew he still had a lot to learn.
“I should have been there,” Elladan said as the made their way slowly from the healing rooms. “I could have...” he started to say but then merely shook his head
“It would have made no difference,” Glorfindel replied, “and I would not have put you at risk.”
Elladan stopped dead in his tracks and had turned to glare at the older elf. His fists were clenched at his side as he stood his full height, coming almost eye to eye with Glorfindel.
“How is my life any more important than theirs were?” he growled. “What does my destiny hold that I have more right to live than anyone else?”
“Whether you accept it or not, you are the lord of this realm,” Glorfindel replied. “We took the vow to protect both land and lord.”
“I know what vow must be given,” Elladan replied, close to shouting now. “I once took that same vow. I meant it as much then as I do now.” He said “I will not have anyone else taking a risk that I would not take myself.”
“Your father would never have...” Glorfindel said only to have Elladan hold up a hand to silence him.
“I am not my father,” Elladan pointed out. “I will run this realm as I see fit.” He quickly added, “I will be joining the next patrol.” His hand went up again when Glorfindel went to speak “I do not need your permission.”
Elladan turned and started down the hall. He had not failed to notice the elves that stood watching them. He stopped briefly and looked over his shoulder. He was not surprised to see Glorfindel right behind him.
“Take some time to cool off,” Elladan said suddenly. “I need to do this on my own.” Without another word, Elladan turned down another hallway and out of Glorfindel's sight.
“He will not be convinced to stay behind,” one of Glorfindel's captains said as he came up next to Glorfindel.
“I am aware of this fact,” Glorfindel replied. “How many divisions are on duty?”
“Three,” the elf replied. “Two are camped at the borders and Thalion's company is scouting the northern fields.”
“Gather the rest. I want every remaining member of all divisions on the training grounds within the hour,” Glorfindel commanded.
“My Lord?” The elf tilted his head, not sure what Glorfindel had in mind but seeing the rage in the older elf's eyes made him more than just a little nervous.
“Now!” Glorfindel snapped, not in the mood to have his orders questioned. If Elladan wanted to be foolish enough to go out on patrol then Glorfindel was going to make sure that everyone’s training was as sharp as ever, including Elladan`s.
~~
“If you feel the need to be angry at me then so be it,” Elladan hissed, his anger building as Glorfindel once again had managed to knock Elladan's sword from his hands. “I will not change my mind.”
Glorfindel had planted the tip of his sword into the ground and stood beside it, his arm crossed over his chest. He glanced at the division briefly then looked back at Elladan.
“You are distracted and unfocused,” he said. “You've left your back open too many times and you know better,” he added “I may not change your mind but I will do whatever it takes to keep you alive. Look at them, Elladan. Every one of them would die to protect not only this realm but you as well. If you insist on going on patrol then you must all learn to fight together.”
“I do not need a lesson,” Elladan said. He didn't back down when Glorfindel stepped closer, bringing them almost face to face.
“I told you once, I would not have you put at risk,” Glorfindel replied. “I am aware of your abilities to fight Elladan, however, they are not,” he said, pointing at some of the younger elves that were watching. “They need to see. I would have them trust your abilities as much as I do.”
“I am not finished, ”Glorfindel said when Elladan opened his mouth to speak. “We have only six divisions left compared to the dozens we had when you first began your training. Most of them have not seen the wars we have, nor have many of them even had to fight until recently. You need to trust me.”
“I have always trusted you,” Elladan replied, standing his ground. “Even when you are being a pig headed, overprotective twit.”
Glorfindel arched an eyebrow slightly and glanced towards the younger elves in the division when he heard some of them chuckle.
“Twit?” Glorfindel repeated, barely holding back his own grin when he saw that amused look in Elladan's eyes.
“Would you have preferred blockhead?” Elladan grinned, hearing even more laughter from the elves around them. “Or what was it that Erestor once called you?” Elladan asked. “I believe it was nitwit.”
Glorfindel lowered his head to hide his own grin. It was good to see this side of Elladan again and he knew the past few days had been hard on him. Glorfindel had not exactly helped the situation either and had been pushing Elladan and the others harder than ever.
“Glorfindel,” Elladan started, “the feast is in two days. Allow us some rest before the feast. We will resume this training after a week’s time.”
Glancing again at the others, Glorfindel could see the hopeful looks on the younger elves and he knew he'd been set up. Elladan, it seemed, had learned well from Erestor.
“Very well,” Glorfindel gave in. “One week.” he agreed. He dismissed those who were there for training then stood and watched as they all left the field slowly. He turned to see that Elladan was still there, watching him.
“You asked me to trust you and I do,” Elladan said. “Yet it feels as if you do not trust me. I understand why you do this but I need you to understand my reaction. My father is gone, both my sister and my own twin have chosen to live as mortals. I was thrown into being the lord of a realm, something I did not feel ready for. Going on patrol with the others is the only thing I have left that I can still control.”
Glorfindel knew no reply was needed. He watched Elladan pick up his sword and go, leaving Glorfindel once again alone with his own thoughts.
“You were more ready then you realized,” Glorfindel said, mostly to himself. With a deep sigh, he took hold of his own sword and also headed back toward the manor.
~ * ~ * ~
Elladan had to admit that Glorfindel had been right. The feast had been exactly what everyone had needed. As he looked around the great hall, he could see how relaxed everyone seemed to be. The music had been lively and he had enjoyed a few dances with Sirwen.
He found himself looking often towards the dance area. Glorfindel moved Sirwen easily across the floor and he could hear her laugh at whatever Glorfindel may have said. He recalled other times when he watched Glorfindel moving just as gracefully. It had been each time Glorfindel had been out on the training grounds and teaching the younger elves. During the summer weather, he had often removed his tunic and Elladan had never been able to look away. He'd spent many nights afterwards picturing a half naked Glorfindel. It was still a favorite sight of his.

Elladan thoughts were interrupted when Faeron nudged his side. He felt the heat in his face as looked at Faeron. Elladan was not entirely sure he was blushing from being caught daydreaming. The vision of seeing Glorfindel without his tunic, apparently still had an effect on Elladan.
“I believe she much prefers your dance skills over mine,” Glorfindel said as he led Sirwen towards Elladan.
“Perhaps if you learned to dance,” Elladan said, earning a light chuckle form Glorfindel. “I do recall there being an offer once to teach you.”
“Your mother made that offer,” Glorfindel grinned as he reached down to take his glass of wine, placed there earlier before his dance with Sirwen. “However, at the time I had two very curious elflings to watch over while they explored places they had no business being in.”
“Elrohir was convinced that Erestor's closet had a secret passage to a dragon's lair,” Elladan whispered in Sirwen's ear. “He was half right, the passage lead to Erestor and Glorfindel's private office.”
Sirwen covered her mouth as she tried to keep from giggling. She glanced up towards Glorfindel who merely smirked, raised his glass towards her then walk away.
“You know he heard you,” she told Elladan softly. “One would think you are both elflings the way you tease each other at times,” she added.
Elladan laughed and nodded in agreement. He took her glass of wine from her and set it aside, wrapping her arm around his after having kissed her hand.
“One more dance?” he asked. “Then we'll sneak off to somewhere we can be alone.”
“One more,” Sirwen replied, looking forward to having him to herself. She looked up and smiled at him as he led her back to the center of the dance floor.
As, Elladan slid his arms around her, the music slowed. He chuckled at the timing then winked at her as Sirwen slowly slid her arms up around his neck.
“Everyone is watching again,” Sirwen whispered softly.
“Let them,” Elladan replied. “It will give them something to talk about.”
“Us dancing together?” She asked, giggling softly.
“No.” Elladan grinned wickedly “This will.”
Before Sirwen had a chance to ask him what he meant, Elladan kissed her. He slid one arm around her waist and pulled her closer against him. His free hand moved into her hair just as the kiss deepened even more. Neither one heard the applause around them until the kiss had ended.
“You are a wicked elf,” Sirwen told him once she caught her breath.
“Yes I am,” Elladan chuckled. “And you will find out just how wicked I can be later.”
Sirwen saw the flash of desire on his eyes and she not only shivered against him, but the heat in her cheeks let her know she was blushing as well. They had been intimate before, a few times but they had always kept such displays of affection private. It would take some getting used to on her part but she was pleased at no longer having to hide how they felt about each other.
“I look forward to it,” she replied, whispering in his ear. This time she felt him shiver against her and could not help but laugh.
As the music changed again, Elladan lead her back to where they had been sitting earlier. As he picked up his glass of wine, he looked around for Glorfindel but it appeared the older elf had already left the hall.
“Come,” Elladan grinned. “It is time to keep your promise to get me alone.”
Sirwen had taken the last sip of her wine and nearly choked as she heard his comment.
“I believe you said we would have some time alone,” she said, kissing his cheek softly. She rolled her eyes at the innocent look he gave her. “That look does not work with me.”
“Perhaps not,” Elladan said “but, I will find what does work with you.”
It only took them a few minutes to reach the gardens. The night's weather was still warm and there was a small breeze for them to enjoy.
“How is it we always end up here?” she asked quietly, smiling as Elladan led her over to one of the garden benches. Normally she would sit beside him, however this time she let him guide her down onto his lap.
“I am not sure,” Elladan replied. “Perhaps this is meant to be our own special place.” he added, tilting her head gently and kissing along her neck “A place for us to make our own memories.”
“Elladan,” she gasped softly as he continued to kiss along her neck. Closing her eyes, she let her head fall back. She whimpered quietly when she had felt him leaving his mark on her neck before he kissed his way to the tip of her ear.
“Perhaps we should go find someplace more private,” Elladan suggested as he nipped at the pointed tip of her ear.
“No,” she gasped softly, “right here.”
Elladan lifted his head to look at her and saw the look of desire in her eyes. He grinned as he kissed her, letting it deepen slowly.
“And you say I am wicked.” He moaned when the kiss ended, leaving them both breathless.
Sirwen's reply was a quiet giggle before she combed her fingers through his hair. She felt him shiver as her fingers grazed the tips of ears. The growl she heard when she repeated the action let her know she was getting the reaction she wanted from him. Daringly, she repeated it again. This time she did not just graze his ears but let her fingers slowly trail along the back of them before she felt along the pointed tips.
“Wicked, she-elf,” Elladan growled as she played with his ears. How he was managing to sit still was beyond him. He shifted just enough to let her feel exactly how her touch was affecting him. Hearing her gasp as she glanced downwards, he grinned. “Here?”
“Yes,” Sirwen nodded, her hand slowly moving along his neck then across his shoulder. “Right here.”
~ ~
“You look like you need this more than I do,” Faeron said, handing Glorfindel what looked to be a full glass of whiskey.
“From Elrond's supply?” Glorfindel questioned after having tasted the first sip.
“He left more than half of what he had.” Faeron nodded, “He assured me it would be needed and, as usual, he was right.”
Glorfindel managed a small grin then downed half the glass in one large sip, clearing his thought as he took a deep breath.
“You need more?” Faeron asked, after Glorfindel finished the whiskey in just two sips. When the older elf nodded in reply, Faeron took the glass.
“It looks to be a long night,” Glorfindel admitted as he stood up. “How hard would it be to convince you to send a few bottles to my chamber?”
Faeron almost snorted as he laughed. He looked at the empty glass he still held and shook his head. He had a feeling this was going to be a bad idea.
“I will bring them to you myself,” Faeron replied then turned and headed to where the bottles were hidden. Faeron knew Glorfindel was still watching him and turned to look over his shoulder. “I will not be long.”
Glorfindel nodded in reply then after the younger elf was no longer within sight, he leaned back and ran his hands through his hair. Finally after a few minutes, he left the dining room and headed to his own private rooms. He knew the promised whiskey would do nothing for his loneliness, yet he hoped it could make him forget, at least for a little while...

~ * ~ * ~ *
Elladan was pleased to see the first signs of spring finally arrive. The winter had seemed to have lasted longer than it usually had. Perhaps it was his restlessness that had made it feel that way. Midway through winter, Imladris had their winter festival. He had sent invitations to both Arwen and Elrohir, but neither had been able to attend. For Arwen, he understood. Aragorn was aging quickly now and he knew his sister did not wish to leave her husband's side.
Elrohir's reply had not said much about his reasons for not attending. He wished everyone well and hoped to visit soon. It was close in wording to his reply the year before and even the year before that. Elladan could only stare at the note, written in Elrohir's near perfect handwriting. It was the only recent item he had of his twin.
“There is time,” Sirwen said as she came to stand next to where he was seated. “You could write him another letter, explain how you wish to see him.”
“I could,” Elladan nodded, still looking over every carefully written word. “It does not seem as if he wishes to see me now, does it?”
“Elladan, if you would just try,” she whispered, knowing how stubborn both twins could be. If one of them were to just say something first, she felt it would at least be a start. It had been years since Elrohir left and Elladan still had not come to terms with his brother's choice.
“I invite him to every feast or festival we have,” Elladan replied. “His reply is always the same.”
“His reply is always as formal as the invite has been,” Sirwen pointed out. “Perhaps you should write him a personal letter, you may get the results you are hoping for,” she told him. “You will never know unless you try.”
Elladan did not give a reply and after a few minutes he heard her closing the door as she left. He let out a deep breath as he crumpled the paper in his hand. He knew she was right and that he was being stubborn yet it had been Elrohir that had left all those years ago. It was not up to Elladan to make the first move and he had already done that in a way. He did not have to send his twin any invitation, yet he always did.
Aragorn was also a concern for Elladan. It had been a mere three years since he had last seen Aragorn. Even then he had looked aged. His hair no longer held any color and Elladan had not failed to notice the tired look in Aragorn's eyes, or the worry in Arwen's.
Having seen Aragorn as aged as he now was, Elladan had wondered again what Elrohir looked like. Was he aging as well or was it different for him since was part elf?... or had been. He thought back to the time he had asked his father if had ever wanted to see his own twin.
“It was enough to have read his journal,” Elrond had replied. “It allowed me to hear of his life yet still remember him as I had last seen him.” He then grinned down at his curious son. “Besides, I do not wish to know what I would look like as I aged.”
Elladan had not been able to understand at the time, he had been too young. However, now he knew exactly what his father had meant. Not about seeing himself as an old man, but about remembering Elrohir as he had last seen him. His biggest regret was still the words they last spoke to each other. They had been harsh, from both sides and then Elrohir had left.
Hearing his door open, Elladan looked over slowly. He was not truly in the mood for company yet he could not help but smile as he saw Sirwen had returned and had brought some food with her.
“You are always more reasonable after you have eaten,” she said, placing the tray on his desk before she made herself comfortable in his lap.
“I suppose you would know,” Elladan replied. He let out a deep breath and for a few short moments, he rested his head against her shoulder. “I am sorry for earlier.”
“I know and I did not take it personally,” she assured him. “I know you miss him, as I am sure he misses you. If I could help I would, however, this is something the two of you must settle.”
“Once again, you are right,” he said, turning her head just enough so he could kiss her softly.
“It would be easier for you if you would just admit that I am always right,” she said, giggling.
Elladan took her hand and kissed the back of it before he reached for something to eat. The room was silent as they both ate only this time it was a comfortable silence. He knew Sirwen was finished when she leaned back against him. He chuckled lightly as he eased one arm around her waist. His free hand slid slowly up along her arm.
“Do you not have work to do?” Sirwen asked quietly, closing her eyes as she felt his fingers softly graze against the skin of her neck.
“It is nothing that cannot wait,” Elladan replied. He moved his fingers up to trail one across the edge of her ear. He felt her shiver against him. He used his hand to tilt her head, lowered his and kissed his way across her neck slowly. “I would prefer to work on you.”
Elladan arched an eyebrow slightly when Sirwen suddenly moved away from him. He watched silently as she moved across the room and then could not help but laugh when she locked the door to his office. He enjoyed seeing the desire in her eyes as she made her way back to him.
As she slid back onto his lap, he slid his arms around her waist again. He smiled as she tilted her head and he kissed along her neck again, one hand moving slowly up the front of her gown. He felt her arching into his touch before she turned her head and kissed him.
“Sirwen,” he moaned when he suddenly felt where she had moved her hand. He had never even felt her pulling at his laces to open his leggings. His breathing deepened when her hand moved inside his leggings. “On my desk is not how I wish to enjoy you.”
“That is not what you said the other day,” she giggled, kissing along his neck as he easily lifted her in his arms. She looked over briefly to see that he was carrying her closer to the fireplace. “However, I do approve of this choice,” she whispered into his ear.
Elladan smiled at her as he lowered her gently onto the pile of furs. They had learned early in their relationship that they both enjoyed sitting close to a warm fire and reading. The furs had been placed here for just that reason, though now they served an entirely different purpose.
“Where would I be without you?” Elladan spoke quietly as he lowered his head and kissed along her neck. Using his free hand, he was easily working her gown open then kissing along her skin as it was slowly exposed to him.
Sirwen had not answered him; there was no reason to. She knew exactly where he would be if she were not part of his life, and she refused to have such thoughts now, no matter how true they were. She knew Glorfindel had stepped aside for her and though she was grateful, she still had her doubts. She would discuss none of this with Elladan, not now or any time in the near future.
“Have me,” she gasped. He had teased her enough, using not only his touch but his lips as well. “Please.”
Elladan would not deny her, not when he wanted her as much as he knew she wanted him. He kissed her passionately as he moved over her. He felt her touch against his shoulders, her hands sliding gently across his skin as he moved into her. He lifted his head to watch her, seeing the pleasure in her eyes and hearing her gasp his name.
“You are mine,” Sirwen gasped, unable to stop the words. Whether he heard her or not, she did not know. She reached up into his hair and let her fingers graze his ears. The growl she heard come from him only excited her even more. She knew he was as close to his limit as she was to hers. When he suddenly marked her neck, the feeling mixed with the pleasure she felt of having him move with her and it took her over the edge.
Hearing the way she had cried out his name, Elladan's also reached his own limit. His own cries of pleasure were soon heard before he lowered his head and kissed her deeply. Moving onto his side, he eased his arms around her, sighing quietly as she snuggled against him. Neither of them seemed to be in a hurry to move away from each other. Feeling her resting against him helped him to relax and for a while, he did not need to think of anything except them.
“What thoughts are running through your mind now?” she asked him softly, her hand gently caressing his chest.
“Only good ones,” he assured her. “I was thinking how good you feel against me like this,” he added, smiling when she giggled.
“Well then,” she smiled as she moved him onto his back, giggling as he pulled her on top of him. “I can allow you to enjoy these kinds of thoughts.”
Any reply Elladan wanted to give was cut short when she leaned down on kissed him deeply. He slid his hands slowly up over her and had pulled her down against him even more then gave her complete control.
It was early that next morning when the two of them left Elladan's office. Had anyone else been awake to notice them making their way back to their own private chambers, neither Elladan nor Sirwen noticed.
“Perhaps now we should sleep,” Sirwen whispered softly as she had moved into Elladan's arms. They had spent the entire night enjoying each other. “You have perfected ways to tire me.”
Elladan managed a small chuckle as he held her gently in his arms. He kissed the top of her head and after promising to use these ways often the two of them drifted into a peaceful sleep, something Elladan only managed when she slept beside him.
Things seemed to settle down for Elladan. The summer feast had been perfect. Once again Faeron had taken over to make sure things had gone as planned. For this, Elladan had been very grateful. Since then, his days had become routine and his evenings, after dinner, were spent with Sirwen.
“Since when do you wear such a formal dress just to enjoy a walk through the garden?” Elladan asked. He had entered their private chamber to find her standing in front of the mirror. Coming up behind her, he slid his arms around her and tilted his head to kiss her neck
“I merely wish to enjoy wearing this while it still fits,” Sirwen replied softly, watching his reaction in the mirror.
“And why would it no longer fit?” he asked, arching an eyebrow slightly.
Sirwen smiled and leaned back against him. Placing her hand over his, she slowly slid his down over her stomach then let it rest there. She was still watching his reaction in the mirror, gigging softly as she waited for him to figure it out. It had not taken long.
“Are you sure?” Elladan asked, his eyes meeting her in the mirror before he turned her around.
“Yes,” she replied, smiling. She slid her arms up around his neck then laughed as he pulled her into his arms and held her tightly, kissing along her neck. She smiled at him as he had offered her his arm and led her to the gardens to enjoy their evening walk.
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Making Choices