Adult-FanFiction.org : Lord of the Rings

The coldest of hearts	By : Nuredhel Category: -Multi-Age > AU - Alternate Universe Views: 2543 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings, it belongs to Tolkien, and i do not earn any money from this work of fiction, it is solely written for entertainment and not for profit at al

Chapter List
- 1-The coldest of hearts
- 2-Salvation
- 1
- 2
This chapter is rather adult in nature, it contains explicit sex and also some disturbing flash back moments. And for the end of the story, tissue alert.
Chapter two: Salvation
For the next days Barah was kept within the rooms all the time and nobody outside of the king’s inner circle knew anything about her punishment. The guards had been locked away and the servants knew how to keep their mouths shut. Barah was bored but she was also scared, she had no idea of what it was that would happen to her and the idea of having lost several days of which she remembered naught was a bit shocking too. She knew that her secret was revealed now, that the king knew of her fear of the dark and her most intense fear was that he would send her back to the dungeon. She knew he wouldn’t, still she couldn’t help herself. She got better, she healed very fast as all of her kin did and her hands did look normal again, her nails were still missing but at least the open wounds were gone. She had put on some weight again and the gaunt expression was gone, she did look like before except from the fact that her eyes no longer were cold and hard. Now they were frightened the whole time and she was acting like a child who has been beaten badly, even the smallest sound made her cringe and if someone raised their voice she almost passed out.
The cold warrior was transformed to a timid and shy little creature and Thranduil was shocked by the transformation. The feast that had been planned was held and she was rather well so the king ordered her to join him, just to get her accustomed to others and to kill the rumors of her being executed. But the reactions were not as he had anticipated, she sat by the same table as him next to his butler and she was shaking like a leaf the whole time, the other elves stared at her with wide eyes and some didn’t believe what they saw. Barah had been extremely arrogant and haughty, so self-centered her presence had been naught but unbearable but now she was cowering before them all, like a whipped dog. What in the name of Eru had the king done to her? There were some rumors claiming that he had forced her to become his mistress and even though that didn’t sound believable at all it only fueled the fire of rumors that spread through the palace.
Barah hadn’t been to a feast ever, she had always stayed clear of social happenings and didn’t know how to behave. Galion knew that this was one elleth to whom the joys of life were utterly alien, the death of the enemy had been all she had lived for. It was a great pity, he was sure there was a lot of good sides to her too, traits that hadn’t been allowed to develop.
Thranduil had an idea of what to do now, he had spoken few words with her lately but he had started to understand her personality better than before. She was coming out of her shell but it was a slow process and she acted as though she expected to be whipped if she even opened her mouth. He had to make her trust again and he had a plan. Two days after the feast he called her to his chambers rather late in the evening, she did obey immediately and arrived staring at the floor as she usually did these days. She was the very picture of someone who had been broken and he cringed inwardly at her expression of shame. Galion had tried to talk to her and explain that the stay in the dungeons had been punishment enough for her faults but she wouldn’t listen to it at all, she felt as though she was something terrible still, that she was a monster unworthy of being around others at all. It was terrifying how she had changed, from ice cold control and hatred to downright self-hatred.
He sat in an armchair with two goblets of wine on a table nearby and she didn’t even dare to look at him. Before she would have ignored him and cared naught about his decision, now she was scared to the bone of everybody. She wore a simple dress made for the servant maids and it was too big for her, the slender frame looked so fragile wearing that garment. She had a warriors body, muscular and with little fat and yet she had a feminine grace to her that was rare and precious. He had a suspicion that she from the hand of nature was both sensual and warm, but it had been smothered by the events that had shaped her tragic life up to this moment. He nodded and held out one goblet. “Here, drink.”
She hesitated for a few seconds before she slowly took it and sipped at the wine obediently. She did make a grimace, it was way too strong for her liking and she didn’t manage to drink all of it at all. He put down his own goblet and smiled, there was a glimpse of sadness in his eyes. “You are healed now, are you ready for what you asked for previously?”
She tensed up and her eyes got wide and she started trembling but she nodded. “Yes my lord”
The words were a mere squeak and he sighed, why was she so afraid of everything? The fear had been her strength but now it had become a ball and a chain dragging her down, she had to be freed from it. He had to stay calm and read her reactions, he had to get to the bottom of the mystery that was her past but to do that she had to trust him, open up completely. He had a suspicion that she had no conscious memory of what it was that had happened and turned her into such a cold hearted person. He gestured towards her. “Very well, first of all, I want you to remove that dress. If you really are to obey me and serve me I want to see what it is that I may command.”
She squeaked again, her eyes flickered and she looked as if she was ready to make a run for it at any second. He saw sweat on her brow and she shivered but she did obey. She opened the lacings and let the dress fall to the floor. She stood there and looked so pathetic, so scared and he shook his head in disbelief. “Do not cower Barah, you have nothing to be ashamed of. “
He knew he was speaking the truth, she acted like a very shy human and that was not natural for an elf, to them their bodies were something of which they were proud, they didn’t try to hide them and were absolutely not ashamed of them. She was very beautiful, slender and elegant and her skin was decorated with strange and yet very lovely tattoos that probably told of her family relations and history. She bit her lower lip, shivered so hard it looked as if she was about to have a seizure. “M…my lord..”
He kept his voice soft and gentle. “Yes Barah?”
She didn’t dare to look at him, Gods, she was so broken, fractured like a crystal vase thrown at a wall. All shattered. Could he have any hope of repairing her injured pride and confidence? He was no healer damn it but he had seen so much and the shame and grief of warriors who thought that they had failed their brethren was something he was very familiar with. She had been guilty as charged but the reason behind her errors had been understandable, and perhaps even excusable. “I…what…what will you do…to me?”
Her voice was a faint whisper and he got up from the chair. He had a plan ready. He got closer to her and she wanted to back away, he saw it clearly. He touched her hair, it was like silk and she smelled of roses, the servants had poured rose oil into her bathing water. The scent was intoxicating. He put a hand on her shoulder and she whimpered and almost collapsed. There were tears in her eyes and he felt so sorry for her. How could she believe that she still was to be punished? The week in the pit had in some way in fact killed her, she wasn’t the same person anymore. “First of all I will massage your back because I seriously doubt that you ever have received a decent massage and then you can return the favor.”
She gasped and flinched, stared at him for a second with shock written all over her face. She had probably anticipated that he would throw her down on the bed and do unspeakable things with her. He smiled and took her hand, she followed him to the bed but she still had that confused look upon her face. He had already put a bottle of oil onto the night stand and he pushed her gently down onto the matrass and sat down next to her. She trembled and grasped onto a pillow as if it was a lifeline. He started to hum and she was as tense as a bow pulled to the breaking point. When he placed his hands on her shoulders she yelped and he had to shake his head in disbelief. “You really are unaccustomed to touch aren’t you?”
She just nodded and whimpered and he started massaging her upper back gently, he knew his own strength so he didn’t exaggerate, he wanted her to enjoy this. The oil he had added made her skin shimmer like dark pearls and he did like doing this, it was a very unselfish deed and she deserved it but she was still tense and could not relax. “M…my lord..I…”
He used his thumbs on some knotted muscles in her neck and she gasped. “Yes?”
She hid her face in the pillow. “How can this be punishment?”
He smiled and didn’t stop. “You swore to serve me right? And you wanted to learn how to feel something else than fear. This is your first lesson so stay alert and allow me to enjoy teaching you this.”
She groaned and dug her face deeper into the pillow, she had a hard body, well trained but not very well taken care off. He noticed this. There was an unevenness in her shoulders because she had been using the bow too much without considering the effects of it and it had caused some problems with knotted muscles. He liked doing this, and she was such an exquisite creature, she slowly relaxed as his hands roamed over her skin and he slowly moved lower. He massaged her entire back and then he moved down to her perfect taut little ass. He was becoming aroused now but he didn’t pay any attention to his own body, he had to make her lower her guard completely, allow him to show her that she wasn’t worthless or a monster. He noticed how she started to tremble when he touched her, that her breath changed and there was something utterly shocked in her eyes the few times he saw them. He did take care of her legs too, they were rather long and strong and well-shaped and he smiled at her. “You have the legs of a thoroughbred Barah.”
She made a grimace and for a second he did see a short glimpse of pride in her gaze. He finished with her feet and she had relaxed completely now, surrendered to him. He smiled and patted her on her shoulder. “Now it is my turn.”
He lay down on his belly next to her and pulled his dressing gown down , she got up and blushed but she didn’t hesitate. She poured some oil onto his back and he choked a whimper, it was cold and she revealed a charming lack of experience with such activities. But she tried, she really did and he just relaxed and allowed her to rub his back and it was in fact not too bad an experience. She had strong hands with long fingers and it felt very good. He was glad he had been able to turn over and lay down without her seeing the fact that he by now was fully erect, he wouldn’t have been a healthy male if he wasn’t, it felt a bit uncomfortable but he didn’t care. She did really concentrate on her job and he just enjoyed it, she didn’t know anything about massaging anyone but she remembered what he had done and tried to mimic it. She too moved downwards and then she hesitated. He nodded. “It is alright.”
She looked very uncertain for a moment, then she pulled the dressing gown off him and started massaging his ass and thighs too. It was torture, sweet torture but torture nonetheless. He realized that it had been way too long since he shared pleasure with anyone, he was almost shivering. He had been celibate for many long years after the death of his wife but in the end he hadn’t endured it any more. He had some short little affairs with willing ellith but there had never been feelings involved, just carnal need and he was very discrete. Now he was close to the boiling point and cursed his own foolishness. He had been over confident, that was for sure. She was too tempting and he lay there and tried to think of ice cold baths and deep snow.
She finished with his feet like he had and she sat there and looked a bit uncertain again. “What now?”
Her voice but a whisper and he turned his head and stared at her, she was blushing slightly and he saw that she was very nervous but also captivated by the novelty of the situation. He took a deep breath. “Do you trust me?”
She whimpered. “I am…I will do whatever you want my lord.”
He sighed. “That was not what I asked you about, again, do you trust me?”
She didn’t look him in the eye, her lower lip trembling. He grasped the dressing gown, used it to cover himself as he turned around and sat up next to her. She stared at him, then she looked down again. He reached out, touched her cheek gently. “I will not do anything if you don’t trust me Barah, but be sure of one thing, I will not hurt you in any way. “
She moved her arms as if to cover herself, her cheeks burned and she still had that confused look in her eyes. “I…I know”
He pushed himself closer to her, she had to meet his gaze and he saw how uncomfortable that made her. She didn’t have her ice cold anger to shield her anymore. “Now do you? I somehow doubt it. But you got some unusual feelings from what I did didn’t you?”
Her eyes went wide and she gasped, her eyes flickering again. “Ah…I…”
He felt more sorry for her than ever before at that moment, she didn’t even know her own body well enough to recognize her own sense of pleasure. He shook his head in disbelief and there was sadness in his gaze. “Oh you poor thing, you have never felt anything except fear and anger have you? You have been in a cage my sweet little one and I will help you break free.”
She did meet his gaze, there were tears in her eyes. “How?”
He caressed her hair gently. “Again, do you trust me?”
She nodded slowly and he smiled. “Then be not afraid, I will not cause you any discomfort. Just allow me to show you what of which you have been unaware until now.”
She was shivering still but he reached out and caressed her neck with his hand, she went rigid again but he didn’t let that stop him. He leaned closer to her and kissed her shoulder, a soft lingering kiss and she gasped and he felt her confusion as something physical. He was slowly covering her skin with kisses and she felt so very warm and soft under his hand. He could smell that he had managed to awaken her desire, and he was very aware of the fact that it was an entirely new feeling for her. It had to be a shock and he wanted to make it a positive one.
He started caressing her breasts with his hand and she gasped and closed her eyes, her nipples were gloriously erect and now she was breathing hard. He grinned, a wry mischievous smile, oh he would show her pleasure, make her feel loved and cherished once more. He pushed her down onto the bed again very gently and leaned over her, started letting his mouth treat her nipples with eager joy. She gasped for air, writhed and now there was a hint of sweat covering her skin, she had no control over her own body now, it was all a chaos of sensations she had been ignorant of.
It was such a shock, but she could not fight it, it was demanding her with both soul and body and she had never felt this strange yearning before. She did trust him, she just knew it. But this frightened her for she had no control of herself, and that was terrifying.
She had not known that her nipples were that sensitive and he was suckling them? Was that right? It felt strange, but good, very good. The weird thing was that she felt it between her legs too and she ached for something she yet didn’t understand. Her heart was pounding hard and she had gotten wet and just by sheer instinct she had started touching him in return. She had grasped onto a pillow with one hand and the other slid through his long silky hair, this had to end, she could not endure it but at the same time she didn’t want it to stop. Why was he doing this to her? Why this unexpected affection and care?
He could sense that she was close now, but he didn’t want to rush it, he wanted this journey to be slow and gentle, not a race. He kept worshiping her breasts and was shocked when she suddenly tensed up and stared at him with huge eyes before she grimaced and groaned, shuddering all over. He could hardly believe it, he knew some females could reach an orgasm just by having their breasts touched but he had never met any of them. She was still shivering, her eyes glazed and distant and it was such a wonderful sight. He moaned, it didn’t exactly put a dampener on his own lust but he couldn’t think about his own need now. She was all that mattered and she lay there with an arm across her face, panting. He lay down next to her and caressed her slowly, let his hand follow the contours of her body. She was blushing like mad. “What…what happened?”
He smiled gently. “You don’t know?”
She shook her head and there was a silly expression on her face. “You came, had a climax. “
She let out a small sound that could have been the start of a giggle. “Oh, so…that….is what it feels like.”
He had to kiss her cheek. “Yes, now you know”
She had a sheepish grin on her mouth. “Thank you.”
He kissed her hand. “You are welcome, I am honored to have shown you this.”
She blushed and her eyes were soft, dreamy. They were actually very beautiful now that the ice cold rage was gone from them. “I never thought it felt that good.”
He grinned and kissed her neck. “You must have known that it feels nice to be with someone?”
She nodded, hid her face again, shy and embarrassed by her own lack of inhibition. “Yes, but it wasn’t for me.”
He sighed and caressed her hair. “How can you say that? “
She swallowed hard. “I…I don’t know. I just…feared being touched…like that.”
He caught her gaze. “Do you fear me? “
She shook her head. “No, I don’t. “
He pulled her closer, enjoyed the sensation of skin against skin, her warmth and the smell of her, he could tell that she would be easy to ignite again and he wanted to teach her more but now there were questions he wanted answers to. “That is good, now, why do you think you have been so afraid of intimacy?”
She tensed up but relaxed again, she felt so safe there with him and the release had softened her, filled her with a sort of drowsy feeling that efficiently killed her doubt and any feelings of antagonism. She hid her face against his throat and listened to his heart beating, a steady calm rhythm that would go on forever. “I…I cannot tell, I can’t remember.”
He stroked her hair gently. “Let me help you remember, let me help you put the past behind you.”
She sighed. “How?”
He kissed her brow and she didn’t flinch, she was really starting to trust him now, it was wonderful. “By letting me see your memories, by helping you sorting them out.”
She tensed up, bit her lip. “You can do that?”
He nodded. “Yes, I can do that. I am not as strong as certain others but I have that gift. Do you trust me?”
She nodded again, knew she had to get rid of the one she had been before she could start anew. “Yes, I trust you. Help me. “
He took her hand and turned her face towards his. “Then look me in the eyes, relax and listen to my voice. Forget about everything else than my voice.”
She did what she was told to do and he started whispering soft soothing words while he allowed his own soul to drift along the surface of hers. This was not like bonding with your one beloved, it didn’t go that deep but it did allow him to see things she had tried to hide even from herself and slowly he descended into her mind and was terrified by what he saw. There was no warmth there, no gentleness or love, only an ice cold empty void filled with fear, with the sensation of being an animal being chased by some unknown terror. She had suffered, a lot. And they had all been too blind to see it. He dove deeper, found memories she probably had suppressed ever since they formed, he was getting closer to the core now, the beginning.
Suddenly he was there, seeing it all through her eyes, through the eyes of a child. She was hiding inside of a hollow tree, a small hole right in front of her eyes and she was staring out at a scene so awful not even Thranduil managed to believe it at first sight. It had been a camp and he knew it had been the camp of her family. Eight adults and twenty children and youths, now it was a slaughterhouse. He saw orcs wander around among the dead cutting meat from the torn bodies devouring it with glee. Some humans were there too, three of the adults were still alive, two ellith and an ellon and he sensed that this one male had to be Barah’s sire. Her feelings indicated that.
She was so scared, so afraid she wasn’t able to move at all. The children had been clubbed to death and the stench of blood and brain matter filled the air like a thick greasy contamination. Some of the youths were kept alive too, he didn’t want to see but she had and he couldn’t avoid seeing what she had seen. He was forced to endure the memory just as she had countless nights. The humans and some orcs were having fun with the living adults and the youths, he saw that the beasts raped them brutally and he sensed the girls despair at seeing her father writhing in agony, tied down while a huge scarred orc abused him grunting and panting with pleasure.
The madness lasted for a long time, the ellith lost consciousness and it was just too grotesque, too terrible. He felt sick to the core and the images would be stuck to his mind for a long time, he wanted to retch. He saw one orc laying on top of one of the young ellith, she could barely be more than a child and the body jerked and shook with every eager thrust from the grinning orc, the girl was probably already on her way to Mandos halls and that was a blessing. At the end the orcs slit the throat of Barah’s father and laughed as he bled out. The poor girl stayed in the tree for two days before she dared leaving it, when the rest of the tribe found her she had lost her memory, she had chosen amnesia instead of carrying the images with her, it had been a self-defense mechanism of the mind.
He pulled back into his own mind and was no longer shocked by her cold demeanor, how could she have reacted otherwise? No wonder she feared intimacy having seen such horrors and it was even less of a wonder she hated orcs. She had seen something that would have broken the very soul of someone older, her innocence and youth had been what saved her from becoming utterly mad. She was shuddering again, her eyes wide with terror and she remembered it all now, everything. She knew that he also had seen it all and she felt so awful. She wanted to run away from it all but he embraced her and held her tightly and she could not escape from the truth. He mumbled soft words to her and she relaxed again, at least she knew what it was that scared her. The darkness within the hollow tree had almost driven her mad and she had carried it with her ever since.
He noticed that she relaxed again and continued caressing her, hoped that she from now on would be able to sort out her feelings and be completely healed. She had suffered a lot and he didn’t blame her for having been a bit weird. She sighed and pressed her face towards his neck, she did really trust him and he grinned and kissed the top of her head. Then he let his hand slide across her skin again, made her squirm a bit when he found a spot where she was ticklish and she gasped for air and wriggled. He rolled her over, started kissing her neck again. “You have already been punished my sweet one, do you understand?”
She gasped again, those strange feelings were returning to her and she wasn’t that afraid anymore. She was in fact more curious than frightened and she wanted to experience that wonderful sensation again, it had felt like an explosion of light within and it had been wonderful. “I understand my lord. “
He smiled and started kissing his way down her body. “And what is left is just healing, and I am glad you have such trust in me.”
She stared wide eyed at him, what was he doing? He kissed her belly button and let his tongue play with it and she started to believe that the servants had put too much firewood in the hearth, it was so warm there. What he did next made her drop her head back down again with a yelp, oh Eru! She had no idea an ellon could do that for an elleth, with his tongue? She was fighting even now, fighting her own body, trying to stay in control as she had before, trying to subdue her feelings but it was too late. He was too set on defeating her inner demons, to set her free. She whimpered and before long she had grasped onto his long hair with her hands, rocking her hips against him and she was covered with sweat, completely lost in her newfound desire. Since she had no experience with such feelings she had no chance of controlling herself, it was as if she was sitting in a canoe without a paddle drifting down a river with rapids and white water. Before long she arched off the matrass and screamed and he felt a bit humble, he was the first one who had witnessed her in such a vulnerable state.
She lay with her eyes closed and she was still breathing hard, he knew that she had the capacity for more so he continued to caress her, kissed and licked and teased her and he explored her gently and was amazed at how easily she surrendered to this. She had no doubt now, no feeling of shame, the pleasure had possessed her and he was stunned by her glow and eager and trusting personality. He started to use his thumb on her clit just to see how she would react and she moaned and arched again, didn’t question him in any way. She allowed him to lead, and yet it was a dance it took two to fulfil. He was aching now, his body screaming for release but he ignored it, his self-control was like iron, he would not let his body decide what he was to do. He let a finger slide into her yet untouched body and she made some mewling sounds and he felt how her inner muscles contracted around this new sensation, it was almost enough to drive him insane.
He added a finger and she started thrusting her hips back towards his movements, her eyes distant and glazed and she whimpered his name. He leaned over her, continued while he kissed her on the mouth, he hadn’t done that before and she answered it eagerly, her hands sliding over his skin and it felt amazing. Instinct was leading her now and she didn’t have any conscious thoughts, her burning need was all that existed and she had forgotten all about what she had seen, because that had nothing to do with what she was engaged in right at the moment. She let out a hoarse cry as she came once more, he felt the wetness that was being forced out of her and he knew that he couldn’t stand it anymore. He was shivering too and sweating and he wanted to take her more than anything else but he didn’t think it was right to go that far. She should not be dictated by her instincts when making such a decision. If she wanted to let him do it she should have a clear mind first.
He had removed the dressing gown and was just as naked as her and she didn’t seem to react to the sight of him with fear, she blushed a bit but there was a curious glint in her eyes and he took her hand and kissed it. “I have helped you my sweet one, could you please help me?”
She giggled and looked nervous but nodded, he laid down next to her and she reached out and he jerked as her hand reached his warm hardened length and closed around it. It felt so wonderful he had to groan and roll his eyes. “Barah, I am already close.”
She had a strange new expression on her face, of a sort of innocent curiosity mixed with determination. She just nodded and continued caressing him, he showed her how to do it with small movements with his hips and she suddenly grinned and spat in her hand before returning it, that made him gasp and stare at her. “Just an idea I got.”
He rolled his eyes again. “Good idea Barah, brilliant!”
He felt his loins tense up, his body prepared itself for his release and the pleasure was rising within him like an arrow shot at the sky. He couldn’t fight it and just hoped that she didn’t get disgusted by what she was about to witness. He cried out and closed his eyes, feeling the waves rush through him and he could not stop himself from spilling, thrusting his hips towards her grip. She gasped and stared with a rather shocked expression on her face but she didn’t look as though she was repelled by it. He just lay there, gasping for air until his body calmed down. Then he got up and got a cloth from a washstand and cleaned off them both. He had spilled over her hand and she crinkled her nose and made a grimace from the smell of him.
She lay down and pulled the covers over them, both felt drowsy now and she had a distant look in her eyes. He put his arm around her and made her rest with her head on his shoulder, she sighed with contentment and closed her eyes. He was sure that she was about to fall asleep but he suddenly hear her voice, drowsy and low. “I have been an idiot have I not?”
He turned his head towards her, frowning. “What makes you say that?”
She sighed and played with his hair, her eyes distant again. “I have sought death have I not? And I have tried so hard to keep everybody away from me, just to make sure that they couldn’t detect my fear and weakness. I didn’t realize what I needed to be healed.”
He swallowed. “Well, I wouldn’t call you an idiot, you didn’t know any better.”
She let her hand slide across his skin, it felt a bit strange since she was so very curious still. “I know but now I do, I was really terrible and do not try to sugarcoat it. It is true. I was a menace. I know you didn’t want me to stay in the dungeons for that long, I know it was those guards fault but first and foremost it was my own fault. I didn’t want to risk being healed, I didn’t want to risk being seen through and I knew you would do that if I was to stay with you.”
Thranduil smiled. “Destiny has its own way of making sure that things happen according to its plan no matter how we try to avoid it. “
She just sighed again and relaxed against his broad shoulders. “True words.”
He lay there and heard how she drifted into sleep and prayed that she wouldn’t suffer any more nightmares. He too fell asleep rather fast and his sleep was deep and undisturbed. He woke up feeling confused and blinked a few times before he remembered. Barah was sitting next to him and she was grinning, a very mischievous glint in her eyes and yet there was something very solemn about her, she was caressing him with a steady hand and he saw that she had found the bottle of massage oil and had applied that to him. He was already as hard as he possibly could get and when he got aware of the sensation she created within him he had to let out a yelp and a moan. “Barah?! Not that I have anything against this you are doing but why?”
His voice was hoarse and husky and it felt so good, she had a real talent and the oil made it even better. He was shivering already and knew that he wouldn’t last much longer. She grinned, her eyes soft and yet there was something in her gaze that made him wonder. “You have helped me my lord, you have showed me who I should be, and freed me from what I was.”
She slowed down a bit, held him on the very edge. “I owe you a lot.”
He immediately knew what she was thinking about but he had no time to react. She was a Dha’egin warrior, so fast and agile few others could compare and she was straddling him before he had time to blink twice. “Barah, no, you don’t have to…Aiiii Elbereth!”
She did it, pushed herself down onto him and he could barely believe her courage and determination. He gasped and had to hold onto her, she cringed and whimpered, her eyes closed and an expression of both pain and joy on her face. She was so tight and warm around him and the pleasure was almost too much but at the same time he felt guilty for feeling thus. “It is my gift to give, and I know of none more worthy”
She started moving, and he tried to make it as easy on her as he could, still shocked by her action. “Barah, you shouldn’t have done this? I hate to see you in pain.”
She just breathed and continued moving, she relaxed more now and there wasn’t that much pain in her expression anymore, she had adjusted to the new sensation and his size and her hands started sliding across his skin once more. “It isn’t that bad now, it really isn’t. It feels right, more than right.”
He moaned and felt that he was getting closer by the second, but so was she strangely enough. She had to have prepared herself before she started stroking him and he gasped her name and laid his hands onto her cheeks. “Look at me my sweet one, let me see you undone”
She locked her gaze with his, he saw the ecstasy rising in her eyes as it rose within him and she pushed herself down one last time, sheathed him completely and cried out his name as he yelled hers. They collapsed in a heap and just lay there, stunned by the force of their climax and the strange sensation of having touched something greater than themselves. They fell asleep again and slept for a while, and when they woke up he could see that she had something on her mind. He knew already that he was dangerously close to falling in love, and he could not afford to do that. He had to keep his cools and think about his realm and his people first and foremost. She played with his hair. “I have been thinking, and I have come to a conclusion. “
He felt a sting of fear, he knew he would lose her somehow, he just didn’t want to, not yet. “Tell me my sweet one, what conclusion might that be?”
She sighed and rested against him , her weight and warmth was so comforting, it felt so right. “I am a warrior Thranduil, and I have fought my entire life. But it was a false life, not the one I was intended to live. I will change my ways from now on.”
He just stared at her and there was something sad in her eyes. “I want to become a scholar my lord, or a healer. The darkness is gone, the age of men has begun and my people will leave as they learn how to deal with all the new things. I….”
She looked down and her hand got a bit tighter. “I will stay until spring, then I will leave for the grey havens. It has to be that way, I am no longer who I was but it will take time before everybody understands this. In the sacred realm I can start anew.”
He took a deep breath, his chest felt so strangely tight all of a sudden, as if he couldn’t breathe. “I…I think that will be a wise decision indeed.”
She grinned, a sad grin. “I somewhat sense that those words are a bit reluctant?”
He grasped her, pulled her close. “Barah, I…I am starting to feel…I can’t explain it really. But I know I will miss you.”
She smiled and this smile was gentle, she kissed his cheek. “And I will miss you too, but there is still months before spring arrives and let’s make the most of it.”
He nodded and kissed her. “Yes, let’s.”

For the weeks to come the palace buzzed with rumors, it was very apparent that Barah now spent most of her nights with the king but there was no announcements of any sort of a change in her official status and everybody was stunned by the transformation that seemed to happen right before their eyes. She did fight still but now she obeyed orders and that cold heartless creature she had been was completely gone. She did forgive the guards who had left her in the pit and she slowly became more accepted by everybody, even her own kin who had feared her and believed that she somehow had been possessed by the spirits of those dead.
She warmed up to everybody and soon she became rather well liked but they all knew that she would leave. Some thought it was a bad sign, the king was very clearly infatuated by her and she openly loved him back but they knew that she needed the final touch to become whole again and that she had to go over the sea to receive. Her mind was still tormented by the memories and she was unable to forget them, even in his arms.
She didn’t waste any moment with him, they spent as much time together as they possibly could and that in spite of the knowledge that it only would make parting even harder. Thranduil wouldn’t leave his realm until all elves had departed it and it could take ages before that happened. The day she was to leave was very somber, a group out of Ithilien had arrived the day before on their way to the havens and she was to join them. She had been with him the night before, they had made love like there was no tomorrow and there had been desperation as well as love in their couplings. He didn’t want her to go, she didn’t want to go but she knew she had to. She was still carrying the remnants of the awful person she had been and she wanted to erase those memories completely. If she stayed her old self could remerge and she didn’t want that to happen, not ever again.
He didn’t come out to see them leave, because he couldn’t let everybody see his tears. He had owned a reputation for being a cold hearted calculating ellon with no heart, and by some miracle the one person worse than himself had transformed him completely. They had saved each-other and having to see her go was the hardest thing he had done since his son left to join the fellowship. They had spoken their goodbyes and she had sworn to wait for him, if he ever chose to sail she would be there, it was a sacred promise. She turned her head as she rode out through the gates, saw a figure standing on a balcony and she quickly averted her gaze, fearing that her heart would break into a thousand tiny pieces yet again.
Thranduil stood there watching the group disappear beneath the trees, then he retired to his chambers which now no longer seemed like a home but like a hollow dreary place devoid of joy. He got drunk and Galion had to carry him to bed and for the nights to come he wept himself to sleep. The butler was becoming very worried indeed and feared that he would fade away. He took the liberty of writing to Legolas explaining the situation but by luck or the will of the Valar he did recover although slowly. There was no doubt that the king missed her terribly and some started to believe that maybe she in fact had been his one. He had loved his queen but not like this, not so completely. Barah had brought something back to him which he had lost earlier in his life, an ability to see things differently, from a new angle. He had been stuck in his own ways for too long.
Then Legolas sailed and slowly the world became a world where mankind became the rulers, the elves left, moved west. Imladris and Lothlorien were abandoned, Lindon too. Ithilien no longer remembered the elves and neither did so many other places once their homes. Greenwood got emptier by the year, more and more left and at the end there were just a few there. Humans were settling within the forest now, and it was changing, no longer remembering the days that were. So the day came, the halls of the last elven king of Arda were abandoned. The dais with the throne torn down, everything returned to its natural state and Galion feared that his king’s heart would break from seeing all that he had fought so hard to maintain being abandoned thus. But he survived, thinking of his son and the strange elleth who waited for him. The massive stone doors were locked for the last time, nobody would ever be able to tell that this once had been a palace, buzzing with life and light and joy but also the home of tragedy, misery and heartbreak. It would keep its secret until the breaking of the world.
The king was very silent during the journey, he had never felt the sea call to him and he had only miniscule respect for the Valar and their ways but now he would have to learn to live a different life. He just hoped he would be able to adapt for the straight road only lead one way. When the ship approached the harbor they could see a huge mass of elves gathered by the pier to welcome the newcomers. Many were just curious while others were eagerly waiting for kin or friends to join them. Thranduil were among the first to disembark, he almost ran down the gangway from the ship, staring around with an almost desperate expression on his face. Galion were right behind him, hoping to see his own wife and children there.
Thranduil turned and saw his son, Legolas looked good and he ran forth and was pulled into a tight hug. “Ada, you finally came.”
He had to wipe tears away from his eyes. Beside his son stood a very pretty elleth with a sweet face and long strawberry blond hair, Legolas blushed. “Ada, this is my wife, Golwen.”
Thranduil had to swallow, he had a daughter in law?! What else didn’t he know about?
Legolas grinned. “There is yet another one here who wishes to meet you.”
Thranduil looked up and then he saw her, she stood in the shade and the soft expression on her face was everything he had ever yearned to see. She walked to him and he embraced her, felt the scent of roses from her hair and felt dizzy. “You are my one Barah, you and you alone.”
She smiled, kissed him. “I know love, I have known since the day I left.”
He looked a bit puzzled, there was something odd about her voice. “Really?”
She nodded and made a gesture. “Yes, if you weren’t then this probably would not have happened. “
He saw a person approach them, a rather tall young ellon with long dark hair and a very handsome face and Thranduil’s eyes got wider and wider as the youth got closer. He looked so much like Legolas it was frightening but he was taller and moved like a cat and the eyes… Thranduil could barely believe what he saw, they were his own.
Barah just nodded. “Yes, your son Thranduil, when I left I didn’t know that your seed had started growing in me, that I was with child. It happened that very night we said our goodbyes.”
He still couldn’t say a single coherent word, Legolas was chuckling. “Oh Ada, I understand you, Imagine, I arrived here at the dock and found out that I had a brother. But fear not, he is really a likeable young ellon, not at all like you”
Thranduil had to gasp and his eyes were filling with tears. “Why you insolent…”
He turned to his son whom he never had met and felt that a strange grief fell over him. This ellon was almost fully grown and he had missed it all, his entire childhood. “I…I do not know what to say my lad…I should have been there…”
The young ellon smiled and Thranduil did see a glimpse of the mischievous nature of his own father in him. “I know Ada. Mother has told me everything about you, and my brother here has filled in the rest. “
Thranduil hesitated but the ellon grasped him and hugged him and a sensation of overwhelming joy filled him. “Oh son, I hope your brother haven’t filled your head with too many lies and by the Valar, I do not even know your name!”
The young ellon smiled and shook his hand very ceremoniously. ”Hello father, I am known as Thrangalad and it is a pleasure to meet you at last.”
Barah came and shared in on the hug and Thranduil kissed her with passion and knew that he finally was whole, finally was home. This was where he was supposed to be, with his family. He embraced them and knew he never had been more wealthy than now, gold and jewels were nothing compared with this. He grasped Barah’s hand and kissed it. “My love, I thought I was trying to save a frozen heart, I didn’t know that the one I was destined to save was such a gem.”
She grinned and ran her fingers through his hair. “No love, it was me who was given the task of saving you, it was because of you I came to Greenwood but neither of us were able to understand it back then. Now I do see, and I know how blessed we are.”
Thranduil wiped some tears away again and sniffed. “Yes, blessed indeed.”
Legolas was walking hand in hand with his lovely wife and he was grinning from ear to ear. “We have a very nice place to live and it has room for several families and rumors are telling that your father will be released from the halls soon.”
Thranduil just grinned, he suddenly felt young again, young and carefree. “Then by Morgoth’s breath hide the booze, or else it will be gone by the next day.”
He suddenly remembered something he had been thinking about for a while and turned to Legolas again. “Your mother…have you…?”
His son sighed but there was a gentle light in his eyes. “She has been re-embodied yes, but the vows you made were broken by her death, she isn’t the same anymore and she has met someone new, someone she truly loves. She has told me she was in love with you but she didn’t love you, I think I know the difference now. She was not able to truly open her heart to you. She sends her best regards and hopes that you will be happy here.”
Thranduil took a deep breath of relief, he had feared that his queen would cause problems but he was very relieved that she didn’t, and he was glad on her behalf. He had loved her in a way and it was good to know that she too had found peace here in the blessed realm. He would go see her some day but now it was his sons and new love that occupied his mind.
The whole family slowly walked towards the lovely inn where they had stayed waiting for their beloved ones and as the sun set in the ocean and lit it on fire with its last rays the last elven king of Arda looked at his two sons and his one true love and knew that you never can wait too long when you are waiting for a good thing. Now they had all the time in the world to get to know each other and catch up on things that had happened and he knew that he never again would lose the ones he loved, no never again.
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The coldest of hearts