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Path of Honor-Part II: Far From Home	By : IdrilsSecret Category: +Third Age > Slash - Male/Male Views: 4869 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings or any of its characters. I make no money in the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 23
- 24
- 25
Chapter 24

I wrote a letter to Legolas that I thought would be satisfactory according to Raenor’s demands. It sounded very convincing, almost too much so. When Legolas read this, he would be devastated. I imagined he would fly straight to Lothlórien to confront me, demanding answers to my sudden change of mind about our relationship. Not only did I tell him I would not bind to him, but I told him I thought we needed to end things. I basically told him that I chose a soldier’s life over a life of love and stability with him. It was sudden. It was quick. It was to the point with little explanation. Legolas would seethe as he read it. This letter would break his heart for sure. Raenor would be pleased with it.

However, I was not going down without a fight. As I wrote the letter, I also came up with a plan to somehow get a message to Legolas telling him to ignore what he was about to read. I’d have to send it separately, and it would have to get to him before the breakup letter. No one could know about it, most of all Raenor. I didn’t know what I was going to do after all this. I still had Raenor to deal with, and his blackmail. And I still needed to figure out how Legolas and I were going to move forward. I’d cross that rickety bridge when I got to it, and hope that I had all the right equipment to make it maneuverable. I couldn’t get too far ahead of myself, though. First things first, make sure Legolas knew I wasn’t going anywhere.

The first letter was finished and left unsealed, just as Raenor said. He wanted to read it, make sure I wasn’t putting any hidden messages within to give Legolas some kind of warning. Now, I was writing the secret letter, short and urgent, telling him that I was being blackmailed, to not believe what he was about to receive, and that I had things under control. When I was sure it was safe, I’d contact Legolas somehow to let him know what was happening. He’d just have to trust me with this.

“All done,” I said to myself, rolling up the small scrap of parchment and placing it within a slender tube. I tucked it inside my boot for safe keeping and headed off to Raenor’s office. On my way, I calmed my nerves as best I could. I needed to appear flustered, angry, and defeated so Raenor wouldn’t become suspicious. He thought he had me dangling over a cliff, and I needed him to believe that.

Raenor read my letter, and eyed me suspiciously. I glared back with narrowed eyes of my own, but he still smiled arrogantly. “You shouldn’t be cross with me,” he said. “After all, I’m helping you keep your position.”

“You’re blackmailing not helping me. If you wanted to help, you would have minded your own business,” I scowled.

“You didn’t actually think you’d get away with all of this, did you? How could it possibly have worked, bound to an ellon, and a Prince no less, and keep your position as March warden?”

I refused to say anything else to him. He won … for now at least.

Still, Raenor eyed me. “You know, I’m a bit surprised at how well you’re accepting this, Rúmil. I thought you would have fought harder. Makes me wonder,” he said.

“You’ve managed to destroy the one thing that means the most to me. You are forcing my hand in this. I’m not doing it willingly. However, my brothers are just as important. I would sacrifice my happiness for them time and time again if it keeps their future intact. I love my brothers, and I’d see no harm come to them in any form. That’s what family does.”

“How noble of you,” he smirked. I left before my mind convinced me to grab the feather quill from his desk and stab him in the eye with it.

* * * *

Immediately, I went to visit Haldir. I needed to get my secret note on its way. I knew Raenor would waste no time sending my letter to Mirkwood. With the royal wedding taking place soon, Legolas would be on his way before long.

I spoke with my brother for a bit before I got to the reason for my visit. I didn’t want to seem too urgent. There was no need to involve my brothers in this mess. The less they knew, the better off they were. So I worked my curiosity into the conversation. “I suppose it’s been a long time since you sent anything by way of a falcon.” It fit in perfectly for we had been talking about different people we knew, one of them being Cúnon, the falconer Haldir used to use on occasion, who had also been a friend of our father’s.

“Well, with the world in chaos as it was, it wasn’t the most secure way to send messages. The orcs watched the skies for such things. And Cúnon wouldn’t risk his birds. They were too precious to him. He’d raised them from chicks, and he had a lot of time and effort invested in them.”

“I’m surprised he still has his business,” I said, fishing for information.

“Oh yes, he didn’t completely stop sending his birds. He just wouldn’t allow them beyond the borders of Lothlórien. When I was on duty on the outskirts, I used to use his services frequently to send messages back to the city,” Haldir explained. Then, a solemnness fell over him as he reminisced. Those had been the days when he was still March warden … when he could walk and fight, and led the troops to many victories.

I needed to find out where he was keeping his business, if he still had one. I laughed as though recalling a memory. “I remember Father taking me out to Cúnon’s home, on the north side I believe, and showing me the beautiful birds. I was so little at the time, and the falcons looked more like the great eagles to me.”

Haldir smiled and looked out of his window. “Ai, yes, I remember too. You always came home so excited to tell Oro and me about it.”

“I wonder if he’s still there, and if he still has his birds.” I thought I might as well just come out with it, since we were in the middle of this memory.

“Last I heard, Cúnon moved to the westernmost area of Lothlórien. I’m pretty sure he still has them. They are trained and wouldn’t leave for the wild,” Haldir said without a clue of my inquisition.

“And now, with the world quieting once more, I suppose Cúnon will allow his feathered messengers the freedom to travel past the borders,” I continued.

Haldir looked me over with sharp eyes that I hadn’t noticed in quite some time. “Are you in need of his services?” he asked curiously.

“It’s a good thing to know in case I ever do need them,” I replied, not saying yes or no to his question. I had my information. Now I could go to Cúnon secretly, and see if he would send my message to Mirkwood.

I spent a little more time with Haldir, and finally decided it was time to go. He bid me farewell, and I told him I would see him tomorrow. I didn’t think he was suspicious of anything, which was good. Now I needed to head out to the west and see if I could locate Cúnon. I had to get word to Legolas. There wasn’t a moment to spare.

As I was moving towards the city gates, I ran into Orophin, which I didn’t need at the moment. Haldir was easier to deceive. His mind wasn’t always clear lately. Orophin would pick up on my nervousness and urgency much easier. I took a deep breath and prepared myself for deception.

“Rúmil, how are you today?” Orophin greeted with a boisterous voice. He was clearly in a good mood.

“I’m doing alright. And you?” I said just as enthusiastically, clapping a hand to his shoulder.

“I am extraordinarily good, brother.” That was obvious. He looked as though he had . . .

“Late night with your female friend?” I jostled.

“Her name is Milya, and if you must know, it was very late indeed,” he boasted.

“How long has it been now … two weeks?” I said.

“We have been seeing each other for a month now, and very soon I am going to ask to court her,” he said with joy.

This was much more serious than I had known. It seemed that love was in the air, and not just with Orophin. Elves everywhere were finding mates and beginning the ritual. War was over. Peace was on the horizon. That’s when the elves thrived, and our communities expanded. I could almost predict when the explosion of newly begotten elflings would begin to infiltrate the Golden Woods.

“You don’t waste any time, do you?” I jested.

“And not a moment too soon.” He smiled and his eyes glazed over with infatuation. “She is definitely the one, Rúmil.”

How many times had I heard that before? But who was I to take away from his moment. I smiled and congratulated him. Then, he came out of his dream state and considered me a moment. “Where are you off to?”

“Oh, I’ve some business out to the west,” I said, giving very little information.

“Want some company? I’ve nowhere to be until later,” Orophin offered.

“No, that’s all right. Spend this time with your lady. I’m sure she’ll be surprised to see you so early.”

“Milya is on duty at the moment. She is a teacher, you know. Very smart, intellectual … beautiful.” And he was in his daydream once more. I had to laugh at myself. It was good to see Orophin in this state. It had been a long time.

“If it’s all the same to you, Oro, this is something I must take care of on my own.”

He became serious, and I regretted my words. That was all it took to make him curious. “Is everything all right? Do you need me to join you?”

“Really, it is nothing serious. I just need to speak with someone, and he is not in the city. Actually,” I sang to change the subject. “I just came from Haldir’s house. He seems in better spirits, and it is such a lovely day. Maybe you can get him out of the house for some fresh air. I think it will do him some good.”

“All right, if you’re sure you don’t need me,” he said disappointedly.

“I’m sure. I’ll see you later, perhaps for the evening meal … unless you are busy.”

“That would be splendid. I am meeting Milya then. You can join us. You really should get to know her,” he suggested.

“I’ll see what I can do,” I smiled and bowed. “Until then.” Now was my chance to head out, but just as Orophin and I were saying goodbye, we were caught off guard by none other than Raenor. I didn’t need this right now.

“Ah, Rúmil … Orophin. Lovely day isn’t it?”

Orophin remained cordial, but I did nothing to hide my disdain for Raenor. I let Orophin do the talking, and remained silently attentive as I watched Raenor from where I stood.

“And what might you be up to?” Raenor asked.

“I am off to see my lady, and Rúmil has dealings of his own,” Orophin answered.

Raenor turned back to Orophin. “Yes, I hear you have a new lady friend. Milya I believe?”

Orophin’s brows creased. “Yes that is her name. Hmph,” he chortled lightly. “Word travels fast doesn’t it?”

“Faster than you might think,” Raenor said, watching me from the corner of his eye.

Orophin was no fool, and he was suspicious of Raenor, who normally didn’t go out of his way to make light conversation with anyone from our family. We usually tried to avoid each other unless it couldn’t be helped. “Is there a reason for your sudden interest in my love life?” Orophin asked accusingly.

“Just taking notice, nothing more. She is a very lucky elleth to have found an honorable elf such as yourself. It’s just nice to see the elves moving forward with our way of life, especially after so much war and heartbreak. You do know her brother perished in battle.”

“Of course,” Orophin said, his tone sounding defensive as though waiting for Raenor to make trouble.

“As a matter of fact, if I recall correctly, he was a soldier in one of your regiments, wasn’t he?” Raenor asked me.

I hadn’t known this. Orophin never mentioned it, and I didn’t know who her brother was. “Actually, I–”

“He was originally stationed at the borders. He volunteered to march to Dol Guldur, even though he wasn’t supposed to go,” Orophin interrupted and answered for me.

Raenor didn’t care about Orophin’s answer. All he noticed was that I didn’t know about this bit of information. However, I pieced it together quickly and knew which soldier he spoke of. Nestaron was one of our best border guardsmen, and was supposed to stay in Lothlórien along with a few other lead border guards. A small number of troops were ordered to keep watch over Lothlórien so we weren’t completely vulnerable while the army was away. Nestaron insisted on going with the army. Haldir, who was March warden at the time, tried to convince him to stay, and that his position in Lothlórien was just as important as those who marched to war. The young soldier wouldn’t have it, and his request was approved. Nestaron never came home.

“Yes, well,” Raenor said, waving a hand. “It’s good to see Milya holds no reservations knowing her brother was under your older brother’s command at the time of his death. Curious how you and her have developed a relationship. Some might say it is out of sympathy. Poor thing. Left here without family, a damsel in distress. Of course, you, Orophin are an honorable elf. I’m sure you would never lead an elleth on under false pretenses. It’s only something I’ve heard in whispers amongst some of the others.”

“Milya is comforted by the thought that her brother died doing exactly what he was born to do,” Orophin said.

Raenor looked at me again, that same arrogant smirk on his face. “Did you not know about this?” he asked me.

“I know of the soldier in which you speak. I was not aware he had a sister. But I do know how much Orophin cares for her and she for him,” I said.

Raenor made a tsk-tsk sound of disapproval. “I’m surprised you were not fully aware, Rúmil. It is not good to keep secrets from one another. That sort of thing will always come back to bite you in the–”

“That will be enough,” Orophin said, defending me. “I must demand that you keep out of our business from now on.”

Raenor eyed us both for a moment. He seemed pleased with himself, and whatever doubt he might have stirred between Orophin and me.

“Just as well,” he finally said, sticking a pompous nose in the air. “I must be going. I have business to attend to, and messages to send.” His eyes bore down on mine as he said it. “Again, congratulations, Orophin.” Raenor said, turning a kind eye towards my brother.

When Raenor was gone, Orophin rounded on me. “What was that all about?”

“I don’t know,” I answered.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say he’s trying to stir things up. Has he been threatening you again?” Orophin demanded.

“It’s just Raenor being Raenor, nothing more. When is he not stirring things up?” I said nonchalantly.

My brother’s demeanor changed as he looked to the ground. “I’m sorry I didn’t mention Milya’s family. I didn’t think it was a big deal, but apparently, from what Raenor said, some might think I am not true about my feelings for her.”

“You are not the type,” I reassured him. “If you say your heart calls out to her, then I believe you. I know you would never intentionally tie yourself to an elleth out of pity or guilt.” I clapped my hand to his shoulder. “Raenor is just trying to put a wedge between us as usual. Don’t let him get to you. This is what he does. And if others are talking as he mentioned, then they are just jealous.” I grasped his shoulder tighter and smiled. “So, I shall meet you and Milya later for dinner. I’m looking forward to it.”

“Alright. See you then,” Orophin responded, and he seemed to be comforted by my words. “Just be careful of that warg.”

* * * *

I finally arrived at Cúnon’s home after a couple wrong turns, taking note that it was a bit further out than I originally thought. I needed to get back to my office, so I couldn’t spend too much time here. His house was a rather large flet built just below a divide in the branches, close to the canopy. I imagined it was this high up because of his birds. I crossed the bridge to his porch, made my way to the front door, and knocked. Cúnon answered and looked me over curiously.

“What is it you want?” he said grouchily.

I bowed respectfully with hand over heart and gave a polite smile. “I am Rúmil, March warden of the Northern guard, and I was wondering if I might speak with you.”

His eyes narrowed as he observed me. “March warden, eh? What would you be wanting with me?”

“Actually, I’ve come to ask to render your services.”

His sight never left me, as he judged me by my face and my position. “Guess I have to let you in … March warden and all. Don’t want to be disrespectful to an officer of the Lady’s army.” He opened the door the rest of the way and waved me in.

The inside of his house was simple, kitchen, wood burning stove, dinner table, living room with a hearth. And then there was a very beautiful writing desk made of white ash with very intricate details carved into the top, inlaid with silver or perhaps mithril. It had built-in shelves and rows of small drawers, each with a set of elvish runes on it. There was a black feather quill and ink on a silver tray pushed to one side, another larger square silver tray which held sheets of parchment, and an oval basket filled with little gold tubes like the one I had in my boot that carried my note. This desk was Cúnon’s pride and joy, the place where he conducted his business. I imagined the drawers belonged to his most important clients with their initials engraved on them. To the other side was a stone oil lamp, round but flat with a long nozzle on one end and a loop handle on the other.

“Care for some tea, March warden?” Cúnon offered.

“No, I’m afraid I cannot stay long,” I said as I looked around his home. It was bringing back some lost memories. “I remember coming here on occasion, as an elfling. My father used your services back then.”

“Who is your father?” Cúnon asked.

“Lagordir, March warden at the time,” I answered.

Cúnon came over and stood in front of me. “Ai, yes. Lagordir, I remember you father. I think I remember you too. You were such a small thing then. All you wanted to do was to see my birds. You were fascinated by them.”

I smiled at the memory. “Yes, it was always the highlight of my day when I got to see them.”

“Then you must be Rúmil of the Lórien Three … Your brothers, Orophin and Haldir?”

“Yes.”

He nodded but his smile faded. “I was sorry to hear about Haldir and his ailment. He is a fine ellon, your brother. Took up your father’s position and did a mighty great thing for Lothlórien. So, you have filled his boots then.”

“Yes.” I walked over to the desk. “Haldir tells me he used to use your services too, until things became too dangerous.”

“Oh yes, Haldir was always sending by falcon. As a matter of fact, he had a drawer there,” Cúnon said, his finger running along the drawers until he found the one he was looking for. “Here it is, same place as your father’s. Lagordir had his own drawer too. After he sailed, I retired it. When Haldir took over his position and became a regular customer, I made a new drawer for him.”

“What do you do with the discarded drawers?” I asked, suddenly filled with curiosity.

“Oh, I keep them. Don’t know why. They’re of no use to me anymore, unless someone new comes along who happens to have the same initials. Guess it’s a sentimental thing. Each one of those drawers held some kind of message that was important. Some changed the course of history on a rolled up piece of parchment with only a few words written on it. Some announced births or deaths, good news or bad.”

“So you still have my father’s drawer?”

“Why yes,” Cúnon smiled. “Wait right there, and I’ll get it.” He disappeared behind a curtain that covered a doorway to a back room.

I looked at my brother’s drawer and touched the inlaid silver rune, wondering what his notes had written on them.

“Here it is,” Cúnon said, reappearing with a small wooded drawer. The silver knob was tarnished from use, but the inlaid initials were still shiny. “Why don’t you keep that?” he told me.

“Oh, well I–”

“He was your father. By right, you should have that. It’s just sitting here collecting dust anyways.”

I smiled as I held a piece of family history in my hands. “Thank you very much.”

“Anyways, you said you were in a hurry. What is it you need?”

“Haldir told me you stopped sending your birds out at one point, but I was wondering if you were open again for business. I have a vital message to get to a very important person … outside of Lothlórien.”

“Depends. Where would you be needing the message to go?” Cúnon asked.

“Mirkwood,” I said, and I didn’t like the look he was giving.

“Mirkwood, eh?” he said skeptically. “I don’t believe I can do that.”

“I understand why you are hesitant, but it is a much different land now. A great cleansing is taking place there, since the dark lord has been abolished.”

“I lost my favorite falcon to that place when the sickness was first spreading,” Cúnon reminisced.

“I can see your hesitancy, and I would agree with you, but I’ve been to Mirkwood recently, and I can safely say that–”

“Oh, it’s not because of that,” Cúnon interrupted. “I’m afraid someone has already rented my bird.”

“Someone … has … rented . . .?” I said with confusion.

“Just beat you by half an hour, unfortunately. A messenger arrived from the army offices with an urgent message for the Prince of Mirkwood. Almost didn’t accept it because it wasn’t standard size. My birds are not used to carrying the larger tubes, but he gave me extra coin for my trouble, and I’m not one to turn away a hefty payment.

I felt my heart drop as I realized who had acquired Cúnon’s bird. “Was the messenger sent from March warden Raenor’s office?”

“As a matter of fact, yes. You know, you need to communicate better. Had you known my bird was already rented, it could have saved you the long trip out here.”

“Surely you have another falcon who can take my message. I’ll pay you triple whatever the messenger gave you,” I begged, a last ditch effort to get my note to Legolas.

“Sorry March warden, but I’ve only one bird that travels to Mirkwood. The others do not know the way. They have other locations that they travel to. That’s how they are trained. One bird for each location. Now, I can take you note and hold it for you. Once my falcon comes back and has rested for the required amount of time, then I can send your message. I’m afraid that’s all I can offer.”

“It’s too late,” I said solemnly. “I needed it to go out now. Thank you anyway, Cúnon.” This was my only chance to intercept the letter Raenor forced me to write. He told me he had a messenger taking it. I didn’t think he meant for the messenger to bring it here. So, when Raenor stopped Orophin and I, it must have been a diversion to give his messenger the time to come out here before I could. He assumed I would come up with my plan, and now it was failed. Legolas would have that letter in his hands before the day was through, and then it would be over. There had to be another way, but I didn’t know what to do.

I started to leave, but Cúnon stopped me and looked at his ornate writing desk. “I suppose I should make you your own drawer now. Your brother, he will not be . . .” he wondered politely.

“No, I’m afraid not,” I said sadly. “His injury is permanent.”

“In that case, could you give him this,” Cúnon said. He went to his desk, opened Haldir’s drawer and emptied it into his hand. There was a small golden tube inside. He brought it to me and dropped it in my palm. “He left this. Told me not to send it until he gave me word. It’s been here for a long time, and since he no longer needs a drawer, I have no reason to hold it any longer. Should he still want to send it I will … free of charge, of course.”

“I’ll make sure to give it to him,” I said, examining the golden trinket in my hand. I carefully tucked it inside a pocket in my tunic.

“You’ll give him my regards?” Cúnon said.

“Absolutely,” I smiled forcefully, and then I went back home.

I laid in bed that night, and I could feel my soul emptying. I knew by now Legolas had read the letter. I imagined his shock and disappointment as he read my script, telling him that I couldn’t bond with him, and that I wanted to end our relationship all together. Would he really believe that without challenging it? I put myself in his place, and after months with no answer to his original proposal, I would probably believe it too. Legolas knew I was hesitant to begin with. He must have thought that I had finally folded and given up on ever having a future with him. It seemed apparently impossible, especially with my new position as March warden. I thought about what it meant to bond with him. The politics of it went beyond two ellyn falling in love. He was a prince in his land, and to bond to him would mean I would have partial right to Mirkwood, unless a contract was drawn up in which I would give up any right. Mirkwood would have two princes. Of course, I was only assuming that this was how it worked. After all, it was Mirkwood, and Wood elves played by a different set of rules. Thranduil would never allow it, would probably have me assassinated. I chortled at the thought, but I wouldn’t put it past the King to consider it. I would have given up each and every right just to be with Legolas, if that’s what it took. I would never know now. He probably hated me, cursed the day I ever stepped foot in Mirkwood.

* * * * *

For the next week, I avoided everyone unless it had to do with army business. I buried myself in my work to avoid grieving. But at night, I could feel the loneliness. A part of me was missing, empty. There was a void in my heart, and I knew it was Legolas. Even across all the miles, I could feel he had moved away from me, my soul. It was more than just missing him after being apart for so long. He was actually gone from my heart, and I knew he believed what he read. The pain I felt was horrible. He was a constant stabbing in my chest, dull but never letting up. Legolas had given up on me, and he took back the precious gift of his love. I wondered if he felt a similar pain within him.

So, this was what it felt like to lose someone. I had never felt such a void in all my life. Not even my failed relationships with Fandir and Túron left me feeling so devastatingly empty. I always knew I loved Legolas, and I always hoped that we would be together forever, but not until now did I realize just how strong our connection was. A part of me was ripped away, and I knew it was Legolas’ soul. Perhaps we had already bonded in some sort of way. Our link to each other was strong, but now it was broken, and I wasn’t sure how I would continue to deal with the loss. Was this similar to losing someone to death? If so, I could finally understand why one would sail. I could see why my mother left after the stillbirth of her last child. The will to go on in this world was overshadowed by the grief of loss, of knowing you would never see your loved one again. I knew now for a fact that if Legolas had died while completing his mission to destroy Sauron, I would have sailed. The only thing keeping me from hearing the sea longing was knowing that Legolas yet lived. But the devastation of knowing he possibly hated me and wanted nothing more to do with me was enough to cloud my brain.

I had to do something.

My first attempt was to send another note to Legolas. It was brief and I asked that he meet with me and allow me to explain my situation. This was something I couldn’t do in a letter. I had to see him face to face. So I made another trip to Cúnon’s home, and found his falcon free to take my message. A week later, I returned to find my new drawer with a small golden tube inside. I excitedly opened it, hoping Legolas had agreed to meet me somewhere. My fingers fumbled as my hands shook, but I somehow managed to unroll the piece of parchment. I was met with a familiar script and words that I recognized because they were my own. It was my note sent back to me, refused by the Prince. I wouldn’t give up that easily, and sent my message several more times, but each time it was sent back to Lothlórien. This wasn’t going to work. I had to find another way.

As I sat in my office, Raenor paid me a visit. My heart dropped. I hadn’t spoken to him since he first blackmailed me. He was smart to keep his distance. It was because of him that I was in this mess.

“What do you want,” I said without lifting my head from my ledger.

“A little bird has sang me a tune. You have broken our agreement,” Raenor said as he glared at me from across the room.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said to try and make myself vulnerable. Again, I was bad at this kind of thing. It didn’t matter much. I knew I’d been spied on.

“Multiple visits to see Cúnon, the falconer. I assume you are sending correspondence to Mirkwood,” Raenor accused.

“I am a March warden. I have dealings with the Wood elves. How else am I supposed to–”

“Cut the shit, Rúmil. I know that you are trying to contact … him.” He said this as though the word poisoned his tongue.

There wasn’t any proof of this. All my notes had been returned and I burned them. “Search my home, my office. You’ll find nothing.”

“I don’t need to,” he said with a smirk. He pulled a folded parchment from his tunic, and I recognized it, the letter from Legolas. “This is all I need to bury you.”

I stared at the letter and its familiar wax seal. The ink on that page were the last words Legolas said to me, proclaiming his undying love and asking for my hand. It felt like a violation to see it in Raenor’s greasy hand.

“Consider this your first warning, and I suggest you make no more personal trips to the falconer,” he threatened. He tucked the note back inside his tunic and left.

Once alone, I let my head fall onto my desk. I laid there slumped over for a while as I tried to think of another way to contact Legolas. I wasn’t ready to give up, even with Raenor’s threats. My first idea was failed. Notes were turned away and came back unread. I couldn’t send a messenger. This was a private matter that would be questioned. I could only think of one other way, and that was to personally go to Mirkwood and demand an audience with the Prince. I would have to devise a plan so that Raenor’s spies couldn’t follow me. I was working alone though. My brothers didn’t know anything about my situation and I wanted it to stay that way. Haldir was in no position to worry for me. He was dealing with his own troubles. His mental state was fragile. He didn’t need to worry about me too. Orophin never did like the thought of my relationship with Legolas, and I would not drag him into the middle of this. I knew I had his love and brotherly support, but he would only be pushed so far. He would never turn me in, but his trust and faith in me would be lost, and that was more devastating to me.

“Rúmil? Are you all right?” came a voice from the door. I looked up and saw Túron. This was the last thing I needed right now.

“You shouldn’t be here,” I said, my voice dark.

“I’m not here for personal reasons. I know better than that,” he replied, and I could hear the slight ire in his words.

“I’m sorry,” I said and I forced a smile. “What brings you here?”

“My employer,” he responded. “Master Pallon of the libraries is having trouble getting permission to ship a crate of books to Mirkwood.”

“Why come to me?” I asked with suspicion. “This sounds like a problem with–”

“I know … but … I’ve tried and I have gotten nowhere with them.” Túron stepped further into my office, slowly as though it was forbidden ground, and in a way it was. “I’m sorry, Rúmil, but I wouldn’t have come here if it wasn’t important. Master Pallon has given me this job, and if I fail him he will let me go. For the first time I have a place and a job that I feel I can do well. You know I was never good at soldiering and my days as a spy are behind me. There’s no demand for my services anymore. But I feel a connection with the library. It is peaceful and the people are kind to me. I haven’t exactly had the best reputation after … well, you know how that story goes.”

I stood from my desk and went to him. “Who is harassing you, Túron?”

“I don’t want to say. I don’t want you to get involved, and if you knew, you would.”

I didn’t like the idea of someone harassing him. I still felt the need to protect him. Our past may be behind us, but he was still my friend and owned a piece of my heart. However, I had my suspicion about who this mystery person was. “Is it Raenor?” I asked softly. Túron looked at the floor and would not answer. “Please tell me. I promise I will not do anything foolish.”

His eyes slowly lifted to meet mine. He sighed deep and nodded his answer. “He has turned people against me because of what happened. He blames me for that soldier’s early discharge from the army. He’s spread rumors about my unsavory ways with ellyn, how I seduce them only to tear them down.”

“That’s not true. You were used. We all were. And Raenor was the instigator,” I argued.

“I know that, and you know that, but with the cover up, the blame was easily laid upon me to bear. I think Raenor keeps my reputation begrimed in order to keep his secret. There was never any way to prove that he was involved in that whole ordeal. Fandir took all the blame for setting up the scheme with the tainted wine. Raenor probably holds something over his head too.”

“One day we will expose him for what he actually is,” I said with ire as I thought about what Raenor held over my head.

“Has something happened?” Túron asked curiously, his head cocked to the side as he waited for me to answer.

I wish I could have told him, but I didn’t want to involve him. He’d been through enough as it was, and unfortunately, some were still making his life miserable. Instead of answering, I inquired about him again. “Why do you stay, Túron? Why not leave Lothlórien and start over somewhere else.”

“Where would I go,” he shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. “Back to my home in Rivendell? You know I cannot go back there with my history. And I have no desire to seek residence in Mirkwood, beneath the ground like a dwarf. Not to be rude, but I don’t think I could ever live in such a confining place. Besides, I don’t think I could leave Lothlórien now.” As he said this, the color darkened on his cheeks and the corner of his sweet mouth upturned slightly.

“You have met someone, haven’t you?” I asked. If there was anything I ever wanted for him, it was to move on as I had done.

Túron blushed even deeper as he nodded. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to be–”

“No, absolutely not. I’ve wished this for you for such a long time now. This is wonderful news, and I am so happy for you.”

“He is very special to me and I to him. It is still new, but it feels like we’ve known each other for an eternity. Lothlórien is his home, and he’d never live anywhere else. I would rather take the ridicule than to uproot him. He is the reason I stay, the reason I don’t care what others say about me, because he knows me better than anyone … except maybe you, of course.”

“I could say the same about–” I stopped before I said his name.

“You’ve asked about me, but you will not tell me about your life. I could always tell when something wasn’t sitting right with you. What is it, Rúmil?”

“It’s a lot of things, but nothing that I want to involve you in,” I said.

“You do know who you’re talking to,” he said smartly. “Out with it.”

“I guess you could say you’re not the only one having trouble with Raenor. He’s found something very personal of mine, and now he’s using it against me,” I fessed up.

“I’m sorry,” he said with true empathy. “He’s been a thorn in your side since I could remember. I wish I could do something, but I’m afraid I don’t have as much pull as I used to.”

Just then a thought occurred to me. “Túron, I know you said you don’t engage in spy work anymore, but would you be willing to come out of retirement for one last assignment?”

“Depends. Does it have anything to do with Raenor?” he asked with an impish grin.

I nodded my answer.

“When shall we start?” he said.
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Path of Honor-Part II: Far From Home