Adult-FanFiction.org : Lord of the Rings

Mending the Broken Pieces	By : LadyLaran Category: Lord of the Rings Movies > Het - Male/Female Views: 13613 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own "the Hobbit" nor do I make money from this story. Tolkien and Jackson are the ones who own the characters and world.

Chapter List
- 53
- 54
- 55
Author’s Note – I apologize for the length of time it took to get this chapter out; I’m pleased but not pleased with it at the same time. However, despite the length of the chapter, I think it will help move Hawthorn in regards to her character growth. As far as the time it took to get this done, I’ve had issues with depression and worries about finances. I’m looking for a better job as the restaurant business does not pay much! Thanks for your patience, and I hope you enjoy the chapter.

Disclaimer – I do not own “the Hobbit” nor do I make money from this story.

Chapter Fifty-four – Helping Hawthorn

After the meal was over and the group had dispersed to rest, Thorin carried Hawthorn to the room her father and uncle had set up in the suite they’d chosen; Glorfindel and Elladan went with them. The king set her in the bed, and both Oin and Elladan gently unbound the dressings on her feet and lower calves. At the soft hissing sound from the healers, Thorin and Gloin caught a glimpse of the burns she had.

“This could have been a lot worse,” the elvish healer said softly, examining the injuries closely.

“Kili got me out of there before it could be,” she answered tiredly. “I could’ve lost my feet if he hadn’t moved so quickly; he was hurt too but didn’t let it stop him from getting me out of danger. He put himself in jeopardy too by doing so.”

“As much as I disapprove of his recklessness,” Thorin answered quietly. “I am grateful for it this time since it ensured you were able to return home.”

Hawthorn gave him a soft sweet smile, glad to be home too. She winced when one of the deeper burns was lightly grazed, looking to see what was going on.

“I’m grateful you weren’t hurt worse than you were, but you’ve lost the toughness your people have regarding feet,” Elladan said, doing what he could to heal the wounds with magic even though he knew her body would reject it within moments. “You’ll have to wear lightweight shoes from now on.”

“I had a feeling that would be the case,” Hawthorn admitted. “It’s worth it considering that no one else will ever be harmed by Sauron again. I’ll learn to walk in shoes and do my best not to complain; it’s not as if anyone from the Shire will ever find out.”

That drew a look of confusion from her family, and she quickly explained.

“The only hobbits who wear any form of shoes are those from the Stoor line,” she told them. “Some believe that they may have dwarven blood because they tend to grow muttonchops and occasionally a little bit of facial hair. Their feet are softer than other hobbits so they are often seen wearing boots. Most hobbits tend to gossip about them when they come into Hobbiton or other towns. Now that I’ll have to wear shoes, it’d be another thing for them to hold against me.”

“Sometimes, your people astound me by the idiotic things they find to hold against people,” Oin groused while putting new bandages on her feet, not pleased with his daughter’s words. “Boots and beards are nothing to be ashamed of, much less something as serious as your own health issues, and yet those people tend to act as if all of this were a disgrace to the Valar!”

“Hobbits aren’t exactly creatures of great intelligence,” she reminded her Calon-tad. “There are a few who are, but most tend to listen to gossip and believe in superstition. I’ve learned not to be surprised by their actions anymore.”

Oin gently brushed her hair out of her face, giving her a soft smile.

“True, natha, but it still frustrates me,” he said. “No one deserves that at all. Look at you, you didn’t let your small handicap prevent you from coming along on this adventure. You’re stronger than the whole lot of them, but they treated you as if you had no strength or value at all.”

She drew in a slow breath at that, and Thorin could see the tears she was struggling to hide. He took her hand, squeezing it to provide reassurance while Oin continued to speak to her.

“Yavanna shaped your spirit, heart, and mind to be incredibly strong, loving, and perfect for the one Mahal shaped for you,” he told her firmly. “No matter what those idiots back in the Shire say, you were made to be my daughter, Thorin’s One, and the Longbeard’s queen. Yes, you have been hurt over the years and your body reflects that but those are injuries that are respected here because of the battles you fought through to gain those scars.

“If we see the strength and beauty in who you are, scars and all, then I do believe it is time for you to do the same. Otherwise, how will you believe our words if you do not accept yourself for who you truly are?”

The tears flowed now, and Oin kissed her forehead before he, Glorfindel, and Elladan left the room. The healer had left the door halfway open, knowing the elves would hear anything if he needed to intervene for propriety’s sake. However, the dwarf knew that she needed Thorin right then as she finally began to accept what he had told her.

Once alone, Thorin gently tugged her into his arms and held her. She cuddled into him, holding on as she cried quietly. He said nothing, simply humming to soothe her while allowing her a chance to try to face her inner pains. The king had a feeling he knew that some, if not all, of her insecurities had most likely been played against her by the ring.

When her tears abated, he still remained quiet and let her speak when ready. It took some time before she broke the silence, and he listened as she shared what was burdening her so heavily.

“Soon after we entered Mordor, the Valar entered my dreams,” Hawthorn said softly. “I think they could tell I was weakening, and they wanted to try to help. It wasn’t easy.”

“How so,” Thorin asked, prompting her to continue with her story.

“Despite how I try to hide it, I have let the harsh words, shunning, and other actions of my fellow hobbits to change a lot of who I am,” she whispered. “I stopped smiling and didn’t sing or play my instrument again. The hurt stayed inside, and I was too afraid to do anything to heal it. I just lived my life, trying not to hear what was being said. Lady Nienna said that would make me even more vulnerable to the ring.”

His arms tightened, but he didn’t say a word. He could feel the tension relax when he held his beloved tighter, and he didn’t loosen his hold on her.

“She was right,” Hawthorn said. “The Ring showed me that I’d be a burden to Calon-tad, uncle..you. That your people wouldn’t accept me because I’m broken inside. That you would eventually hate me and send me away. It kept on and on, and the only peace I had was when we shared our dreams together.”

“A gift from Irmo that I will always be grateful for,” Thorin told her, shifting her slightly so her head was against his heart. “It meant I could be there for you while having to remain behind.”

“That was the only reason I kept my sanity,” she admitted. “That and the others trying hard to help, Kili especially. He never left my side unless it was absolutely necessary. They all kept telling me that I was strong enough to do this, that they believed me in. I was standing over the chasm in Mount Doom, and the ring’s voice kept growing louder and louder. All I could hear was it and you, but it was trying to drown you out.”

“What was it saying?”

“That I would not be enough for you without its help,” Hawthorn whispered. “That I could be more than a broken queen who could not grant the wish of every couple. It told me that you wouldn’t keep me if I didn’t claim the ring for myself. Something snapped then, and that’s when I told it to ‘shut up and die already.’ I couldn’t handle hearing those lies anymore.”

“That you admitted they were lies was a big step,” Thorin told her softly. “You know that I would never let you go; you were grown for me by Yavanna to match me, and I am not one to toss away the most precious treasure on Arda.”

A blush rose in her cheeks, and she looked up to meet his eyes. Seeing that she was listening, he continued speaking to her. If he could help her through these old wounds, then Thorin would do his best right now.

“You are not broken, laslel. You are so strong, talented, and amazingly kind. You focus on the needs of others even when you are in pain, and the people around you respond to your gentle kindness. You, kurdel, are just what I and my people need to heal and grow. All of us have faith in you, and we will do all we can to help you. You’re not doing this alone.”

“I know,” she whispered, still meeting his sapphire gaze. “I understand that but believing it will take time. I’ve been hearing those harsh words and experiencing the shunning since the fall, and it’s hard to believe anything beyond all of that.”

“It will take time, but you will eventually focus on the true words spoken around you,” he promised, gently resting his forehead against hers. “I will spend every day of my life helping you to reach that point and taking joy in seeing you shine as you should.”

“Thank you, Thorin,” Hawthorn said, eyes closing as she enjoyed the closeness.

He could feel her body slowly relax even further, and he smiled as he answered.

“You are most welcome, laslel. I know I speak for all of us when I say that we want to see you smiling and hear you singing freely,” he murmured. “You have such a gift for music, and that should be allowed to shine.”

She made a sleepy sound, snuggling into him. His warmth helped chase away the shadows from her tired mind and allowed the aches to fade. Hawthorn drifted off to sleep with a small smile on her face.

Thorin allowed her to rest, grateful to sense no fears or pain on her side of the bond for the moment. He spied Oin glancing into the room on occasion but did not move as he knew his cousin would not chide him for this. If it meant Hawthorn would rest well, then the healer would allow the king to hold his betrothed as she slept.

In his heart, he prayed to Mahal that he would find a way to help Hawthorn work through her inner pain so that she could become what they all knew she could be. He also lifted a prayer to Nienna, hoping the Gray Lady could contribute to his betrothed’s healing. Hawthorn deserved to live a life away from the shadows she had been thrust into by her people, and he would do everything in his power to have her thrive in the light.

Author’s End Note – Translations for the endearments: laslel, rose of all roses, and kurdel means heart of all hearts. If I’m not exactly right, I do apologize! This is a short installment, and I’m sorry for that. I needed to hit the target, which was the inner turmoil and past pain Hawthorn faced. Now we can move forward on lighter notes for a while. Thank you all who have been so patient with me. Let me know what you thought of this chapter. ~ Laran
- 53
- 54
- 55
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Mending the Broken Pieces