Adult-FanFiction.org : Lord of the Rings

Love’s Healing Flame	By : Argleena Category: -Fourth Age to Modern times and beyond > AU - Alternate Universe Views: 947 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: The following work is based on the fantasy world and characters created by J.R.R. Tolkien and I do not own them or profit from this piece of work.

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
Because Erestor valued his relationship with Glorfindel and had actually thought he found a lifelong friend, other than Elrond, that he could open up to and trust, what happened next felt all the more like betrayal. It was like a slap that had come from nowhere landing directly across Erestor’s face. It brought back ancient insecurities he had as an often bullied elfling. If Erestor was a weaker elf, this incident might have broken him. As it was, it left some tiny cracks on his heart and in the foundation of his fëa. While Erestor had grown up in an environment rife with betrayal and paranoia, Erestor never let it change him and tried not to let it affect how he treated others. Thousands of years removed from that situation it was a freezing cold bucket of water over his head to realize someone who he respected, admired and considered his closest friend betrayed him, and broke his trust. Erestor even dared admit, it broke a piece of his heart. Erestor was in denial before about the hold Glorfindel had held over him, but there could be no denial of that when the loss of his trusted friendship left him broken inside.
     It all started when Glorfindel returned shortly after lunch from investigating the security breach on the Northern Border. This was the same afternoon Erestor had overheard some of Glorfindel’s officers gossiping about and wagering on deceiving him to go to the Lover’s Festival. Erestor had returned to his office and threw himself back into his work, mostly forgetting about those disgraceful elves. Hours later his stomach was rumbling and he decided to catch the end of the lunch rush. After his meal, Erestor realized that Glorfindel had not returned yet and would not be back in time to get lunch in the dining hall. Erestor had saved some foods from lunch that wouldn’t spoil quickly and made a lunch tray to save for his friend. It was a simple meal, but would sustain him better than the handful of nuts and stick of dried meat that he would probably eat otherwise. Glorfindel was all the time making certain Erestor kept himself nourished, he figured he would return the favor. About an hour later, Erestor received notice that the group that had rode to the border had returned. Glorfindel would have to check in with him after the task so that Erestor could file the appropriate security reports. After another two hours had passed since their return, Glorfindel finally came to check in with Erestor. Although curious about what took so long for Glorfindel to check in, he didn’t mention anything, because Glorfindel was an important and popular elf. He very well could have gotten interrupted on his way over. Erestor greeted Glorfindel as he sat in the chair on the opposite side of Erestor’s desk. Erestors signalled Glorfindel to wait a moment as he stepped over to the table at the side of the room and grabbed the lunch tray he had saved for Glorfindel.
     “You're probably hungry,” Erestor stated, handing the tray to Glorfindel. “I saved this for you. Figured you could use a decent meal for when you got back.” Erestor gave Glorfindel a small smile and then returned back to his seat at the desk so that he could complete some of his more mindless work as Glorfindel ate and updated him on his latest adventure.
     Glorfindel responded with a brilliantly bright smile after Erestor handed him the saved tray. Taking stock of the meal, he noticed many of the foods were some of his favorites. Erestor had specifically picked the strawberries, raspberries and blackberries from the fruit salad to give him, leaving behind the blueberries which he didn’t care for. He also included a sweet roll, one of his favorite desserts and created a delicious looking salad with all of his favorite veggies. He even left the dressing on the side so that it wouldn’t get soggy. There were a number of other small items placed on the tray, all his preferred foods selections. Despite how nonchalant Erestor had acted, he really did put effort into compiling this assortment of food and Glorfindel noticed.
     All through his meal, Erestor noticed that Glorfindel was quieter than usual. Usually after a trip to the borders, Glorfindel was full of stories of what they found and any “mishaps” that occurred along the way. Poor, clumsy Feredir somehow always managed to unseat himself from his horse and land in a puddle of mud on these forays. It’s not like he was losing his seat in battle, he would be trotting along at a walk and find himself on the ground. He also always manages to land in the mud. There could be one muddy puddle in a kilometer long stretch of path and that will be where the mishap occurs. Erestor also noticed Glorfindel seemed to keep sneaking subtle glances at him, studying Erestor’s face with a strange sort of intensity when he thought Erestor was focused on his papers. This was somewhat odd behavior from Glorfindel. Glorfindel seemed to be acting nervously around Erestor this afternoon. Erestor couldn’t figure out what was going on with him. He didn’t recall doing or saying anything to elicit this type of reaction from Glorfindel. Did something happen on his trip? Did he fall asleep after securing the border and have one of his nightmares in the woods for all his soldiers to see? Despite wanting to pepper Glorfindel with questions to ensure he was okay, Erestor decided to give him time to come out with it on his own. Glorfindel was always great about going to Elrond or Erestor when things were getting him down or bothering him.
     Glorfindel finished his lunch and then gave Erestor a rather brief summary of his border report for the records. He found himself stumbling over words, distracted and forgetting what he had just been saying, almost like he was anxious to hurry this interaction along and leave. Erestor definitely noticed and thought it quite peculiar but decided if Glorfindel didn’t let him know what was going on with him by tomorrow he would consult Elrond. He really didn’t want to see Glorfindel slip into another patch of depression and extreme anxiety, it hurt Erestor to see Glorfindel suffering from his past.
     Eventually Erestor and Glorfindel got up and bid one another adieu. Glorfindel had to head to the training fields and make up the earlier lessons with his recruits that he missed and Erestor had a meeting with Elrond in a quarter hour. On his way out the door, Glorfindel paused for a moment and nervously wound his hands together. He looked like he was having some type of internal conflict taking place in his mind. Eventually gaining his courage after taking a long, deep, cleansing breath, Glorfindel took two steps back into the office to stand to the side of Erestor’s desk.
     With one hand reaching into the breast pocket of his cloak and eyes skirting away from direct eye contact with Erestor, Glorfindel stated in a quiet and slightly wavery voice, “Whatever you choose, it will not affect our friendship or my deep regard for you.” With that he shakily pulled out a blood red envelope, embossed with red hearts around the borders and sealed with a white wax rose. He set the envelope gently on Erestor’s desk. With a quick nod of his head goodbye, Glorfidnel pivoted back toward the door and walked swiftly off toward the barracks.
     Erestor stared at the envelope sitting on his desk, frozen in shock and fear. This couldn’t be what he was thinking it was. There is no way. Glorfindel would never do something like that to him. Glorfindel was never cruel to anyone, even to the dwarves who chopped a chunk out of Asfaloth’s mane on a drunken bet. Sure he was upset and a little angry, but he reigned in his temper when scolding them the next morning. Glorfindel is the elf who refuses to even treat orcs with unnecessary cruelty. Yes, he certainly will kill any orc or creature of Morgoth that crosses his path, but he doesn’t try to torture or cause them any undue suffering when he could end it quickly instead. He was always quick to remind his trainees that the original orcs were once elves. Tortured and corrupted to be made that way, they’ve already suffered so much. Glorfindel always said giving into one’s temptations and urges to make others suffer, or get revenge, even if their opponent caused suffering themselves, would be making him more comparable to Morgoth than he ever would want to be. That being said, was he really doing this to Erestor, his friend of centuries? Would he really try to drag Erestor into a cruel, twisted joke at Erestor’s own expense, all just for a silly wager or a few laughs from his comrades?
     Erestor knew what was in that inoculos looking envelope. It’s not like he hadn’t spent hours pouring over paper samples and color swatches and calligraphy styles with Celebrían to create the perfect invitations for the Lover’s Day Festival. He had spent hours helping design the “lover’s invite,” which was Celebrían’s fanciful idea. In a bid to assist shy or hesitant elves to invite their crushes or secret loves, she created invitations that those in the household could select from and use to invite their love interests. She also planned it so that established couples could use them as well, such as to indicate their interest in attending the event by inviting their partners or to just for use as part of a romantic gesture. She also claimed that they made a nice keepsake for those that collect such things. Couples new and old may want to hold onto memories of the festival. Despite what he thought was a waste of time, Erestor had toiled for hours over the course of several days to help Celebrían create the perfect invitation.
     For several minutes Erestor just stared at the offending envelope on his desk, trying to fully understand what he was seeing. His brain tried to go down the route of denial and making excuses for what else might be in the envelope, but in his heart of hearts, he knew. Erestor hovered a shaking hand above the envelope, working up his courage, as scared to touch it as if it was some venomous spider that would jump up and bite him. After several minutes of trying to process his shock and loosen the knot in his stomach he picked up the stationary. Plucking the seal off the front, Erestor opened the envelope and pulled out what was inside. It was just as Erestor expected. An invitation for him to accompany Glorfindel to the Lover’s Festival. Dropping the envelope and invitation as if they had burned him, Erestor swept the papers into his top drawers and slammed the drawer shut so that the offending materials were out of sight.
     Erestor’s vision blurred and he felt the stinging saltiness of tears forming in his eyes. Using every last bit of fight he had left inside of him, he willed the tears back before a single drop could fall down his cheeks. He wouldn’t give those wicked elves the satisfaction of making him cry. He was stronger than that. No wonder Glorfindel had been late to report to him after he returned. He must have run into Huríon or one of the other officers that were in on the bet Erestor had overheard them discussing earlier and been invited to join in on the wager. It surprised Erestor that they would even invite him to participate in the first place, knowing that Glorfindel is Erestor’s close friend. Erestor would have thought Glorfindel would have shut down the entire situation the second he caught wind of what was taking place. He tended to be very protective of Erestor and his feelings and never tolerated any of the gossip or bad mouthing that had been aimed toward Erestor in the past. Why was he going along with it now? Maybe he had always been going along with these elves the entire time and Erestor just didn’t know. Had Glorfindel been laughing behind his back? Or worse yet, was he sharing Erestor’s secrets and personal memories with others, making the Erestor the butt of their gossip and cruel jokes, behind his back. Erestor really didn’t think that Glorfindel would do that, but then again why would he take part in their little game either.
     Erestors mind was buzzing with a mix of emotions. He felt like how men acted when they got badly injured and went into what Elrond called shock. Despite having piles of work to catch up on and a lecture to prepare for Elladan and Elrohir’s lessons tomorrow, Erestor needed to step away for a second. Gathering his cloak, he left his office and made his way to the old gazebo in the east gardens. This was Erestor’s favorite spot to go to when the world seemed to be working against him. It was calming and peaceful and the perfect place to meditate, though Erestor had a feeling no amount of meditation would fully relieve this pit of nausea bubbling in his stomach.
The worst part of this whole situation was, a part of Erestor, deep deep down, wanted the invitation to be real. He wanted it to mean that Glorfindel felt the same way about him that he had been feeling and hiding away from Glorfindel for so many centuries. Erestor knew that if the invitation had been genuine, he would have accepted and would have looked forward to the Lover’s Day festival in a way he’d never been able to in the past. Erestor not only had to now mourn the loss of his best friend, but also the loss of the one he loved. He could never trust Glorfindel again after this. This would certainly make aspects of his job very awkward as well, he couldn’t just stop interacting with Glorfindel when it came to running the realm. He would just have to do his best to move forward professionally while cutting him out of his personal life.
     After a couple hours spent in the gardens, Erestor had managed to get his whirling emotions and buzzing mind under control. He readied himself to return inside and get back to work. Just because his whole world was falling apart doesn’t mean the affairs of the realm would slow down one little bit. Erestor would steadfastly hold together the broken and worn down pieces of his heart and fëa and move forward with his responsibilities. It would do him no good to go crawl into bed and wallow in his miseries alone in his darkened rooms. His work always provided a better distraction to pull him away from stewing on the impending disaster that was his personal life.
     Erestor returned to his duties, and for the next several days stealthily avoided Glorfindel at every approach. After a couple of days of Erestor avoiding his approaches, Glorfindel began to look very put out and the smile that always came so easily on his face now looked forced. Twice now Glorfindel had almost cornered him, but after a week of avoidance he seemed to give up. Erestor had not yet shared with Elrond what had happened, he felt embarrassed and foolish about not recognizing what was happening behind his back. He was supposed to be the all observant Chief Advisor after all. Elrond had approached him a couple times expressing concern for Glorfindel, telling Erestor he was considering pulling him off his duties temporarily until he could get his head straightened around. Erestor replied with some non-committal murmur. He couldn’t allow himself to worry about Glorfindel right now, if he did he would lose what little grasp he had left on his sanity and will power.
Translations:
Fëa- soul
- 7
- 8
- 9
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Love’s Healing Flame